“Dad, this one says ‘try to write a story in just six words.’”

She didn’t ask for a screen. She didn’t whine. She didn’t even come to me first. She just walked over to the table, took out a piece of paper and a pencil, and started writing.

Here’s the thing. I hadn’t touched that box in months. Life got busy, the blog went on pause, and I honestly forgot it was there. But my five-year-old didn’t. She knew exactly where it was, exactly how it worked, and exactly what to do with it. I wrote about that moment a few weeks ago, not because it was some big parenting victory. But because this dumb little box of paper scraps had become a real thing in our house, quietly doing its job even when I wasn’t paying attention.

That box is what I call The Boredom Box. And if you’ve been reading this blog for any amount of time, you’ve probably heard me mention it. I’ve referenced it in multiple posts, and it has become the backbone of The Screen-Free Dad. But I’ve never actually sat down and given it the full treatment: what it is, how to build one, how to fill it, and (most importantly) how to make sure it doesn’t end up collecting dust in a closet.

That’s what this post is.

A complete guide to The Boredom Box.

So let’s get into it.

What is a Boredom Box?

A Boredom Box is a physical container, a jar, a shoebox, a bowl, a bag, whatever you have, filled with slips of paper that each list a single screen-free activity. When your kid says, “I’m bored,” they pull a slip and do whatever it says. That’s it. No app. No decision fatigue. No Googling “things to do with kids” while your child melts down in the background.

What makes it work is almost embarrassingly simple. It relieves you of the burden of decision-making in the moment.

When your kid hits you with “I’m booooored” at 4:30 on a Tuesday, your brain is not at its creative best. The Boredom Box takes that pressure off and gives your kid a sense of agency (they get to pull the slip), a hit of surprise (they don’t know what they’ll get), and a concrete next step that replaces the reflex to reach for a screen.

Why boredom is not the enemy (and why a Boredom Box is not about avoiding it)

Before we get into the how-to, I want to address something that might seem like a contradiction. If I’m handing you a box designed to cure boredom, doesn’t that mean I think boredom is bad?

No. Actually, the opposite.

Boredom is one of the most underrated gifts you can give your kid. I know that sounds ridiculous, but the more I’ve dug into the research, the more I’ve realized that the “I’m bored” moment is not a problem to solve but rather an opportunity in disguise.

A 2014 study published in the Creativity Research Journal by Dr. Sandi Mann and Rebekah Cadman found that people who performed boring tasks before being given a creative challenge produced significantly more creative solutions than a control group. The researchers found that daydreaming acted as a bridge between boredom and creativity. Basically, when your brain has nothing to do, it starts wandering, and that wandering is where creative thinking flourishes.

Dr. Teresa Belton at the University of East Anglia has been studying this specifically in kids. Her research found that boredom is essential for developing what she calls “internal stimulus,” the kind of inner drive that leads to genuine creativity. She interviewed writers, artists, and scientists who all pointed to childhood boredom as a critical part of their creative development. Even more interesting: her earlier work showed that children in communities without television scored significantly higher on imaginative thinking than kids with TV access.

What I’ve learned is that boredom helps children develop planning skills, problem-solving abilities, frustration tolerance, and self-esteem. When kids have to figure out how to spend their time, they learn to make plans, gather materials, and work through problems on their own.

I wrote about this in The Hidden Cost of Screen Time: the real issue with screens isn’t what they show our kids. It’s what they replace. And one of the biggest things they replace is this exact kind of unstructured, self-directed play that arises from boredom.

The Boredom Box is not about eliminating boredom. It’s about giving kids a launchpad when they’re stuck. Think of it as a bridge between “I’m bored” and self-directed play. The slip gets them started. What happens next is up to them.

My five-year-old, for example, has pulled a slip that said “draw a picture” and ended up spending 45 minutes building an elaborate art studio out of couch cushions. The slip was just the spark.

Dr. Jamie Jirout at the University of Virginia backs this up. Her research suggests that providing structure to unstructured time, such as giving a starting point rather than leaving kids completely at a loss, actually fosters deeper engagement.

That’s exactly what the Boredom Box does. It gives your kids just enough structure to get started, while still leaving enough room for creative decision-making.

How to build a Boredom Box (step by step)

Building a boredom box for kids takes about 20 to 30 minutes. You don’t need to block out an entire afternoon or Saturday morning. You can do it tonight before you put the kids to bed.

Here are the steps:

1. Find a container: A mason jar, a shoebox, a cereal box, or even a mixing bowl. It genuinely does not matter. Ours is an old deodorant box. If your kid wants to decorate it, great. If not, a plain box works just as well.

2. Grab paper, scissors, and a pen: Regular printer paper, cut into strips. Nothing fancy. If you’ve got colored paper, go for it. If not, white is fine. This is not a Pinterest project.

3. Write one activity per slip: Keep prompts specific. “Build a fort with couch cushions and blankets” works better than “Build something.” More on what to write in the next section.

4. Fold the slips and drop them in: Part of the magic is not knowing what activity you’re going to pull.

5. Put the box somewhere visible: Not in a closet. Not on a high shelf. Somewhere, your kid can see it and reach it without asking for help. Ours sits on a low shelf in the living room, right next to the books.

6. Involve your kids: Both our five-year-old and our two-year-old helped come up with activities. Our five-year-old even wrote some of the slips (with a lot of creative spelling). That gave them ownership over the box, which I think is a big part of why they still use it months later.

And honestly? That’s it. Six steps, and you probably already have everything you need in a kitchen drawer right now.

Now, I know what you might be thinking: I love the idea, but I do not want to sit here and brainstorm 200 activities from scratch. I get it. That’s the part that stops most people.

To save you the brainstorming step, I put together a free guide with 200+ pre-written prompts you can print, cut, and drop straight into your box. Download the free Boredom Box guide here:

How To Build A Boredom Box

521KB ∙ PDF file

Download

Download

What to put in your Boredom Box

This is the question everyone asks, and honestly, it’s the most difficult one to answer. Because realistically, you can put anything you want in your boredom box. And I’m not trying to dodge the question or anything, because it’s really 100% open-ended.

My one piece of advice is to be specific. It’s easy to get into a rut of writing a bunch of generic activity ideas, but I promise you that if you spend the time now writing out specific and creative ideas, your boredom box will be a lot more successful.

To get you started, here are some activity ideas you can use:

Active and outdoor prompts

These get kids moving and burning energy. Think:

• Set up an obstacle course in the backyard using whatever you can find

• Draw a hopscotch board on the sidewalk with chalk and play 10 rounds

• Go on a nature scavenger hunt (find something rough, something smooth, something red)

• Have a dance party to three songs in a row

• Play freeze tag in the yard

Creative and craft prompts

These involve making something. They don’t need to be elaborate:

• Paint rocks and hide them in the front yard for neighbors to find

• Build the tallest tower you can with blocks, then draw a picture of it

• Make a card for someone in the family

• Create a puppet out of a paper bag and put on a show

• Draw a map of an imaginary island

Imagination and pretend play prompts

These spark storytelling and role play:

• Open a pretend restaurant and take everyone’s order

• Put on a talent show for the family (acts must be at least 30 seconds long)

• Pretend you’re a scientist and do an experiment with water and food coloring

• Create an imaginary world and tell Dad three rules about how it works

• Set up a stuffed animal school and teach them something you know

Quiet and independent prompts

For low-energy moments, rainy afternoons, or when you just need 20 minutes:

• Pick a book and read (or look at the pictures) for 15 minutes

• Do a puzzle

• Listen to a kids’ audiobook or podcast episode

• Write a letter to Grandma (or draw a picture for her)

• Sort your stuffed animals by size, then by color, then by how much you love them

Family and connection prompts

These are the ones designed for together time:

• Cook something together (pick a recipe with three ingredients or fewer)

• Play a board game or card game

• Go for a walk around the block and count how many dogs you see

• Have an indoor picnic on a blanket in the living room

• Tell each other your favorite memory from this week

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What happens when it doesn’t work

I’d be lying if I said the Boredom Box works perfectly every time because it doesn’t. Let me be honest about that.

Sometimes my five-year-old pulls a slip, and the activity completely bombs. The puppet show lasts 90 seconds. The nature walk turns into a tantrum because she wanted to go the other direction. The “build a tower” prompt falls apart, literally, and she’s in tears. That happens.

Sometimes the box sits on the shelf for a week, and nobody touches it. Life gets hectic, routines shift, and the box becomes invisible even when it’s right there. I’ve had stretches where I forgot about it, too, and the screens crept back in as the default.

And sometimes, on the hard days, a screen is just the right call. Your kids are sick or overtired, and the box is right there, but you still reach for the remote instead. And that’s okay. That is genuinely okay.

The Boredom Box is about having a system in place so that most of the time, when the “I’m bored” moment hits, you have something to reach for that isn’t a screen.

The goal is progress, and progress means some days the box saves the afternoon and some days it doesn’t. Both are fine.

If you’re still wrestling with all-or-nothing thinking about screen time, this piece on mindset shifts is worth a read.

Start Tonight

Let me bring this back to where we started. A five-year-old girl standing on her tiptoes, pulling a folded slip of paper from an old deodorant, completely unprompted, on a random Tuesday evening. No fanfare. No parenting win of the year. Just a small, quiet moment where a simple system did exactly what it was built to do.

The Boredom Box won't transform your family overnight, nor will it eliminate screens or guarantee that your kids never whine again. But it will give you something to point to when the “I’m bored” hits. It will take the pressure off your brain in those exhausted, 4:30 p.m. moments. And if you give it a few weeks, it might just start running on its own.

You can build one tonight. Twenty minutes, some paper strips, a pen, and whatever container is sitting in your kitchen right now. That’s it.

And if you want to skip the brainstorming step, grab the free Boredom Box guide with 200+ pre-written activity prompts right here:

How To Build A Boredom Box

521KB ∙ PDF file

Download

Download

Print it, cut the slips, drop them in a box, and you’re done.

Then come back and tell me how it goes. I can’t wait to hear what your kid pulls first.

With this in mind, we walked into the church, and I saw a small podium and a stool; it hit me that those two items created a very simple yet effective store. I stood behind the podium and said, “Hello, everyone, and welcome to my store. What would you like to purchase today?”

Immediately, my kids were intrigued.

They took turns coming up to the store and asking to buy different things, exchanging them for pretend money, and also taking turns as the shopkeeper. We played this game for almost two hours as my wife practiced for her performance.

And what’s funny is that, in the moment, it felt like I had just stumbled into a way to keep my kids entertained while we waited, but the more I’ve thought about it, the more I realize this is the part that we as parents sometimes forget: play is not just fluff.

The American Academy of Pediatrics views play as a vital component that supports healthy development and strengthens parent-child relationships, a significant assertion given that, on the surface, it appears to be simply children being silly.

So yes, in that moment, I needed a way to keep my kids from melting down in a church building, but what was also happening was that we were connecting in a way that is actually really meaningful, and they were getting to do the kind of work kids naturally do through play.

Imaginative play is something we often hear about from parenting experts, and it can sometimes start to feel like one more thing we’re supposed to do, but there are real reasons it matters.

Pretend play is often linked to skills such as self-control, working memory, and flexible thinking, which are essential for helping kids navigate real life. And you can see that even in a simple game like playing store, because they are waiting for turns, following role rules, and dealing with little pretend problems like “we’re out of bananas” or “the credit card machine broke.”

But even if you ignore every study, you can still see what’s happening right in front of you. Because your kid is practicing being a human in a low-stakes world, and you’re building a connection while they do it.

However, as adults, we often find ourselves at a loss because we are so out of practice, which makes it difficult for us to figure it out.

What we often forget in the moment is that kids have incredible imaginations.

They don’t need you to create an intricate storyline or build a whole imaginary world. They just need one simple idea and a starting point, and they can build it into something amazing.

Much like we trust doctors to give us advice about our health, we can trust our kids to lead imaginative play. They are the experts, and as adults who are out of practice, we need to lean on their expertise to lead us through imaginative play.

In this post, I aim to demonstrate why imaginative play is often easier than we think. I’ll also give you a simple, practical on-ramp for starting in the moment without overthinking it, so your kids can do what they already know how to do, and you can step into it with them.

Why most dads freeze up during pretend play

If I’m being honest, the hardest part of imaginative play is not coming up with an idea.

It’s starting.

Because many of us find ourselves in the same spot: we want to play, our kids want us to play, and when the moment comes, we draw a blank and get lost before we even begin.

Not because we don’t care, or because we’re boring. But because we’re out of practice.

Most adults are trained to be efficient and put together. We’re used to doing things with a purpose and doing them “the right way.” We’re used to being able to explain what we’re doing and why we’re doing it.

Imaginative play is the opposite.

It’s inefficient on purpose. It doesn’t always make sense and can often feel a little ridiculous.

And if you haven’t done it in a long time, it’s not surprising that it feels awkward. It’s like showing up to a sport you haven’t played since middle school. You remember that you used to know how to do it, but the second you try, everything feels slow and clunky.

And it’s in that moment of feeling awkward that we begin to feel discouraged.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of trying it once, only to feel awkward, and your kid gets bored, walking away. You tell yourself, “Well, I tried,” and then you give up, hoping to try again next time.

And don’t get me wrong, I’m not judging any dad who falls into this cycle. It is easy to fall into because it happens to all of us. Myself included. Yes, I found success this time at the church, but that is just one moment out of probably 10 other tries that failed. I’m re-learning how to do this, just like each of you is.

However, something important to remember is that most of the time, your kid walking away isn’t a sign that you've failed. It’s just part of how kids play. They bounce around, test ideas, and they get distracted. And honestly, a lot of times they’re also watching you. They’re seeing if you’re actually going to stay in it for a minute, or if you’re going to quit the second it feels uncomfortable.

They aren’t bored as much as they aren’t sure if you are into it as much as they are. Because the truth is, they don’t care what they are playing; all they care about is whether or not you are going to play with them.

So, how then do we prep ourselves to be ready when the time comes to play?

First, we need to change our mindset.

You’re not bad at imaginative play. You’re rusty.

And rust comes off way faster than you think. Especially if you stop putting pressure on yourself to be impressive. Your kid doesn’t need you to create some intricate storyline or build a whole imaginary world. They just need you to step into the first simple idea and let them do what they already know how to do.

Kids don’t need us to be creative geniuses. They need us to be willing.

Three simple steps for imaginative play

Here’s the simplest way I know to think about imaginative play when you’re in the moment and don’t have time to overthink it. Because the goal here is not to become some kind of “imaginative play dad” who always has an idea ready to go, the goal is just to have a dead-simple on-ramp you can use anytime your kid is standing there looking at you, waiting for you to start.

I call it the 30-second on-ramp, and it’s basically three steps.

First, notice a prop

And when I say prop, I mean anything, because it could be a podium and a stool like it was for us, or it could be a blanket, a cardboard box, a stick, a random grocery receipt, a paper towel roll, a couch cushion, or literally anything else that happens to be nearby.

Kids do not need the “right” toy; they just need something that can become something else.

Second, name the world

And this is where a lot of us get stuck because we feel like we need to explain the whole game or set up some intricate storyline, but you don’t; you just need one sentence, because the sentence is the doorway into the game, and once you say it, your kid will fill in the rest.

Here are some ideas you could use:

• “Welcome to the store.”

• “This is our spaceship.”

• “Shh, we’re in a dinosaur museum.”

• “We’re at a restaurant, and you’re the chef.”

Remember, the point is not to be clever; the point is to make it real enough that your kid can jump in.

Third, start the loop

This is the part that makes the whole thing work. Because once you have the prop and you’ve named the world, you just need a basic action you can repeat, so you give your kid a role, and you give yourself a problem, and then you repeat the same simple thing over and over until your kid complicates it.

So, if it's a “store,” your kid is the shopkeeper, and your problem is that you need to buy something. You walk up, ask to buy something, they give it to you, you ask how much it costs, you pay them, and you do it again. The repetition is not boring to kids; it’s the whole reason the game gets good, because the repetition gives them room to experiment, iterate, and try new ideas inside a structure that already makes sense.

And the best part is that if you do these three steps, you don’t have to carry the whole game on your shoulders. Because once you start the loop, your kid will almost always take it somewhere, and your job becomes a lot simpler, because you’re not trying to invent the world, you’re just staying in it long enough for them to build it.

How to kick off imaginative play without begging, bribing, or overexplaining

One of the biggest things that helps imaginative play actually happen, especially when you’re tired, or you’re in a public place, or you’re just not feeling super creative, is this simple principle: don’t ask, just play.

Because I think a lot of us as parents try to be polite about it, so we’ll say something like, “Do you want to play store?” or “Do you want to play pretend?” and it sounds like the right approach. But the problem is that the second you ask, you turn play into a decision. And decisions invite “no,” even when your kid would have happily played if you had just started.

Another reason asking can backfire is that starting is the hardest part. Not just for us, but for kids too, because kids usually have a million ideas in their heads, but they don’t always know how to get the game going, and they also don’t always want the pressure of being the one to initiate it. So when you start the game for them, it’s like you’re giving them something to step into instead of putting them on the spot to decide.

So instead of asking, you just go straight into it, and you make it obvious that you’re willing to be silly, willing to commit, and willing to lead for the first ten seconds, because that’s usually all it takes for your kid to jump in and take over.

Here are a few ready-to-go opening lines you can use anywhere, because the more you have these in your back pocket, the easier it is to start without overthinking it:

• “Quick, I need help. The store is open, and I forgot what we sell.”

• “Attention everyone. The train is leaving in ten seconds.”

• “I’m the customer. You’re the expert. Please save me.”

• “Welcome to my restaurant. I will be complaining politely the entire time.”

• “Oh no. A dragon moved into the living room.”

And once you start using the “don’t ask, just play” approach, you realize something pretty quickly: you don’t actually need a lot of creativity to make this work. You just need a few dependable starting points that you can pull out when your brain is tired, and your kid is standing there waiting.

Because that’s the real issue most of the time. It’s not that you don’t want to play, it’s that you can’t think of what to do fast enough, and then the moment passes.

So here’s a quick cheat sheet you can use this week. Something you can glance at and immediately have an idea you can try in under ten seconds.

A) Props that do all the work

• Blanket = cape / tent / ocean

• Chair = bus / horse / rocket

• Box = mailbox / oven / treasure chest

• Paper = menu / map / ticket / “official paperwork”

B) The easiest games to repeat

• Store

• Restaurant

• Doctor’s office

• Airport

• Post office

• Fix-it shop

C) Over-Arching Rule

If you can explain the game in one sentence, it’s probably perfect.

The real goal of imaginative play is showing up and letting your kid lead

When I think back on that night at the church, what still makes me laugh is how little it took. It was a podium and a stool.

That’s it.

There wasn’t some elaborate setup, there wasn’t a plan, and there definitely wasn’t a perfect storyline. It was just a couple of random pieces of furniture that happened to be in the right place at the right time, and the second we treated them like a store, my kids took it from there.

And that’s really the point I hope you'll take away after reading this.

Imagination is already in your kids. It’s not something you have to install in them, nor is it something you have to build from scratch for them. Your job is just to open the door, step through it with them, and stay there long enough for them to do what they already know how to do.

So if you try this this week, I’d love to hear how it goes, because I know every family has their own version of the podium and stool, where something random becomes the start of a game that you never would have planned.

What’s the most random object your kid has turned into something else?

Or if you already have a go-to, what’s your family’s easiest pretend game?

Imaginative play doesn’t need to be impressive, and it doesn’t need to look like what you think it’s supposed to look like. Most of the time, it looks like a random object, a weird voice, and a kid who’s thrilled that you’re actually in it with them. That’s the win.

So if you’re feeling stuck, don’t wait for inspiration. Use what’s already around you, and let your kid do what they already do best.

It has been a while since I have hit “send” here. Life with two little kids, a full-time job, and preparing for a new baby coming in February (please pray for me) has been a lot. I have not stopped thinking about The Screen-Free Dad, though, or about what it could mean for dads like us who are trying to be more present without pretending life is calm or easy.

So instead of a big announcement, I want to share one small screen-free win from our house.

The other day, my 4-year-old came up to me while I was working and nudged my arm. I looked down and saw something that made me smile. In her hand was a small slip of paper that said, “Try to write a short story in just six words.”

That might not mean a lot to you, but it meant a lot to me.

Earlier this year, I introduced the idea of the Boredom Box. It is a simple box filled with over 200 little slips of paper, just like this one my 4-year-old showed me, with screen-free ideas to do when you are bored.

Over the last six months, life has been absolutely insane, and, reluctantly, I have let The Screen-Free Dad fall to the wayside. But even while I have been neglecting the project, one simple thing has persisted.

Roughly two to three times per week, my 4-year-old walks up to me and hands me a slip of paper with a screen-free activity on it for us to do. Sometimes it is quick and easy. Sometimes it turns into a bigger moment. Sometimes I am tired and do not really feel like doing it, but we do it anyway.

This simple Boredom Box continues to have a strong impact on our family, even when I am not actively “working on” Screen-Free Dad as a project.

So my invitation for you is simple: pull your Boredom Box back out and remind your kids it is still there, ready to be used. And if you do not have one yet, you can grab everything you need to make your own at this link. It includes the same style of prompts my daughter has been handing me, plus a simple template you can adjust for your family.

How To Build A Boredom Box

531KB ∙ PDF file

Download

Download

Once you have it printed and ready, here is what comes next:

• Grab a box, jar, or bowl. It does not need to look nice.

• Sit down with your kids and look through the screen-free ideas together.

• Cut out the slips of paper from the download (and add any of your own ideas to the blank ones) and toss them in the box.

• A few times a week, let your kid pick one slip and commit to doing whatever it says, even if it only lasts ten minutes.

Remember, it’s not about perfection or creating extravagant moments with your kids. You just need enough time and effort to create that little moment where your kid nudges your arm and invites you into something that is not a screen.

Lately, I have been thinking about how this little Boredom Box has quietly outlasted my own consistency. It kept nudging my daughter toward connection, even when I was not very actively nudging this project forward. That has reinvigorated my commitment to The Screen-Free Dad. If something this small can keep making a difference in our house, then it is worth showing up here again and building this with you.

So here is what you can expect moving forward. Just like the Boredom Box, it will not always be a big, polished thing. Some weeks, I will send you a full-blown article or a deeper reflection. Other weeks, it might just be a short story, a quick idea, or a simple prompt you can try with your kids that night. But the commitment will be there. I am in this with you, and I am looking forward to seeing what we can build together, one small screen-free moment at a time.

I believe in this project, and I hope you do too.

Scott
The Screen-Free Dad

Earlier this week, I introduced a screen-free activity inspired by Global Day of Unplugging. One where my kids and I turned our kitchen into a makeshift music studio using whatever we could find.

We grabbed mixing bowls, pots, measuring cups, and wooden spoons, and within minutes, we had ourselves a band.

A chaotic, rhythmically questionable band.

But a band, nonetheless.

We called ourselves Turnip Friends, which, in true 4-year-old fashion, had no connection to music and everything to do with what made her laugh in the moment. (Honestly? It’s growing on me.)

This was one of those activities that didn’t need a lot of prep or a perfect plan. We grabbed some spoons and bowls, made some noise, and ended up having a blast. But as always, the real value wasn’t in the chaos but in what came out of it: curiosity, connection, and a solid 36 minutes of focused play.

In this post, I’ll break down what worked, what didn’t, and how I’d tweak it for next time. I’m also introducing a new rating system so you can see, at a glance, whether an activity is worth trying in your own home.

Here’s how our first jam session went, what I’d do differently, and how Turnip Friends scored on the official Screen-Free Dad activity scale.

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What went well?

This activity kicked off fast. There was no setup drama or rules to explain. We just needed a couple of bowls, spoons, and a green light to make noise.

Here’s what stood out:

• It got their energy out.
  My kids didn’t just sit and tap. They marched, spun, and treated the kitchen floor like a concert stage. It became a full-body activity that burned some serious toddler energy.

• They got curious.
  My 4-year-old started asking all kinds of questions: “What’s a beat?” “Why does this one sound different than that one?” It opened the door to a conversation I wasn’t totally prepared for, but I loved that she was thinking about it.

• They stayed engaged.
  Band practice held their attention for 36 minutes, which might not sound like much until you try to entertain two kids without screens for half an hour straight. That’s a win.

• I got some unexpected dad cred.
  I’m not exactly musically gifted, but I managed to hold a basic rhythm. And in my kids' eyes, that made me a rock star. For a moment, I was the cool dad who could actually “play drums,” even if my instrument was a frying pan.

All in all, it was one of those rare activities that hit the sweet spot: simple, fun, and actually held their attention.

No screens, no stress, and a surprising amount of laughter. I didn’t expect a bunch of kitchen utensils to bring that much joy, but I’m glad they did.

What didn’t go so well?

Even with all the fun, there were a few bumps worth mentioning. Nothing major, but enough that I’d approach things differently next time. Here’s what went down:

• “What’s a band?”
  I figured naming our band would be a fun, silly part of the activity. But my kids had no idea what a band was. That led to a slightly confusing detour where I had to explain the concept of a group of people playing music together. Once they got it, they were in, but it definitely slowed things down.

• Tough questions, no answers.
  My 4-year-old started asking questions about rhythm and timing that I couldn’t really answer on the fly. “Is this the beat?” or “How do you make it go like a song?” I did my best, but I found myself wishing I had done a little more prep, or maybe watched a short video, or had a simple song ready to demonstrate.

• Ending felt… chaotic.
  Toward the end, attention started to fade, and the instruments went from being played to being launched across the kitchen. It was clear we hit the limit, but there wasn’t a natural way to wrap it up. Next time, I’d have a better exit plan. Maybe ending with a “final performance” or a cleanup challenge set to music.

None of these were dealbreakers, but they reminded me that even simple activities can benefit from a little structure. A few tweaks on my end would’ve made things smoother and probably stretched the fun even further.

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How long did it last?

We made it 36 minutes.

That might not sound like much, but in toddler time, that’s basically a full concert. There were no screens and no formal plan. It was just two kids, a handful of kitchen tools, and one very willing dad.

The first 10 minutes were pure chaos (in a good way). After that, it shifted into more focused play: tapping out rhythms, trading “instruments,” and even trying to play along together. Around the 30-minute mark, things started to unravel as attention waned, and we wrapped it up shortly after.

For a zero-prep activity that held both kids’ attention for over half an hour, I’d call that a win! If I had added a little structure at the end like a “band finale” or silly closing routine, it probably could’ve stretched to 40+ minutes without much effort.

What will I do differently next time?

The activity was a hit, but there are a few things I’d tweak when we do it again:

• Start with a quick intro.
  Before jumping in, I’d take a minute to explain what a band is and show a short clip of a group playing together. Just enough to give the kids some context so they know what we’re actually trying to do.

• Bring in a few real instruments.
  Next time, I’ll set out a ukulele, piano, or toy xylophone along with the kitchen stuff. Not only would it add variety, but I’m hoping it might also help them connect the noise we’re making to actual music.

• Add a “final performance.”
  Instead of letting the activity fizzle out when they get bored, I’ll build in a final “concert” for Mom or a favorite stuffed animal audience. It gives the activity a natural endpoint and something to build toward.

• Prep a couple of rhythm games.
  Something simple like call-and-response clapping, or “Copy My Beat,” could give the whole thing a little more direction before it spirals into utensil warfare.

The activity didn’t need much to be fun, but with just a little prep, I think it could become a go-to screen-free favorite.

How would I adjust it for different-aged kids?

This activity worked great for my 4-year-old and 18-month-old, but with a few tweaks, it could easily grow with your kids or work across a wider age range if you have multiples in the mix.

• Toddlers (1–3 years)
  Keep it simple. Focus on sensory play like banging, tapping, and exploring sounds. There is no need for structure. Just let them go wild with safe kitchen items and follow their lead.

• Preschoolers (4–6 years)
  Start introducing basic musical concepts like rhythm, beat, and pattern. Try games like “Copy My Sound” or let them “lead” the band. They’ll love the responsibility and the creativity.

• Older Kids (7+)
  You can take this further by recreating simple songs or challenging them to write their own. Add real instruments or use apps that let them mix basic tracks. They might even enjoy naming the band, designing a logo, and putting on a show.

The kitchen band setup is flexible, and it scales with your kids. Whether you’re just introducing a toddler to noise-making or helping older kids explore real music, this one’s easy to adapt without reinventing the whole activity.

What would I rate this activity?

To make these recaps more helpful, I’m introducing a simple rating system I’ll use for all screen-free activities. Think of it as a quick-glance breakdown of what worked, what didn’t, and whether the activity is worth trying with your own kids.

Each activity is rated across five categories, with up to 10 points in each, for a total possible score of 50 points.

The Screen-Free Score

1. Engagement: Did it hold their attention?

2. Ease of Setup: Was it quick and simple to get going?

3. Creativity Spark: Did it encourage imagination or problem-solving?

4. Physicality: Did it involve movement or hands-on interaction?

5. Repeatability: Would we actually want to do this again?

Kitchen Band Jam: Final Score

1. Engagement: 9/10

2. Ease of Setup: 10/10

3. Creativity Spark: 8/10

4. Physicality: 9/10

5. Repeatability: 8/10

Total: 44/50

This one delivered. It was loud and low-effort and bought us 36 minutes of focused, screen-free playtime, which, for toddlers, is an eternity! We won’t turn the kitchen into a concert hall every day, but this one definitely earned a spot in the rotation.

Next week, we’re trading pots and pans for slides and sidewalks with something I’m calling The Park Crawl. The goal is the same: zero screens and real connection, but this time, we’re taking the chaos outdoors. Stay tuned!

It started with a spoon on a salad bowl.

Not mine. My toddler’s. She was standing on a chair at the counter while I tried to make lunch, and without warning, she started drumming like she was on stage in front of a sold-out crowd. The 4-year-old joined in next, banging on a pot lid with a measuring cup. Within thirty seconds, my quiet kitchen turned into a full-blown percussion riot.

And I loved it.

So this week, we’re going all in.

We’re starting a family kitchen band.

No fancy instruments. No rehearsals. Just a 4-year-old, an 18-month-old, and a dad with absolutely no rhythm trying to make music together.

I got the idea from the Global Day of Unplugging, where they listed it as a fun, screen-free activity. And the second I saw it, I thought, yeah, this feels right.

Because sometimes the best antidote to distraction is noise. Real, joyful, chaotic noise. The kind you create together. The kind you don’t need a screen to make.

So this post is my plan. It’s what I’m hoping will happen, what I’m worried might fall apart, and why I think it’s worth trying anyway. Because even if the music is terrible, the memory might just be gold.

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The Idea Behind the Activity

Over the past few months, I’ve been collecting screen-free ideas from the Global Day of Unplugging, and it’s honestly been a game-changer. Some of the ideas are simple, some are ambitious, but they all have one thing in common: they help me show up for my kids in real time. Not as a background presence. Not as the guy who sets up the activity and steps away. But as a dad who’s in it and who’s with them.

That’s where this week’s plan came from.

Among all the ideas listed, one jumped out: Start a family kitchen band.

At first, I laughed. But then I thought about it:

• No prep.

• No gear.

• No right way to do it.

Just noise. Rhythm. Messy fun. And a chance to see what happens when I stop trying to manage the moment and just join it.

There’s something about making music, especially when you’re not good at it. My kids don’t care if I can keep a beat. They care if I’m present. And this activity gives us the perfect excuse to be loud, silly, and creative together.

Honestly, I don’t know what kind of “songs” we’ll come up with. I imagine a lot of clanging, some shouting, and maybe one moment that actually sounds like a real rhythm. But that’s not the point. The point is to make something together and to have fun doing it.

That’s what excites me.

That’s why we’re starting this band.

The Kitchen Band Blueprint: Step-by-Step

I’m not going into this with a spreadsheet or a Pinterest board. But I am going in with a plan, because with a 4-year-old and an 18-month-old, chaos is a guarantee.

The best I can do is shape the chaos into something we can all enjoy.

Here’s how I’m setting up our first-ever family kitchen band:

Step 1: Set the Stage

We’ll clear a small space in the kitchen. Nothing fancy, just a spot where no one will trip over a stool or knock over the trash can.

I’ll probably lay out a few dish towels to dull the sound a bit (our kitchen floors are loud). Then we’ll name the band. That’s important. Every band needs a name. Maybe “The Sticky Spoons.” Maybe “Noise Machine.” I’ll let my 4-year-old decide.

Step 2: Gather the Gear

We’re keeping it simple:

• Pots, pans, and lids

• Wooden spoons, spatulas, and whisks

• Plastic containers and measuring cups

• A few sealed jars with rice or beans inside for shakers

No real instruments. No batteries. Just whatever we already have in our kitchen drawers.

Step 3: Assign Loose Roles

I’ll give each kid an “instrument,” but I’m expecting them to trade constantly. That’s fine. The goal isn’t to direct, it’s to participate. I’ll take an instrument too. Probably a mixing bowl and a spatula. (Classic dad rhythm section.)

Step 4: Find the Groove

I’ll start with something simple: tap tap tap pause, tap tap tap pause, and see if they copy me. Then I’ll copy them and we’ll layer in a chant “We are the band!” or count down to a big BOOM. We might do one-minute jam sessions with countdowns at the end, just to keep the energy moving.

Step 5: End with a Finale

Every great band needs a big finish. Ours will probably involve yelling “THE END!” and throwing a spoon in the air (gently). Then we’ll clean up together and maybe even draw a concert poster or give out pretend tickets for tomorrow’s “show.”

The best part? None of this has to go according to plan, and that’s kind of the plan. We’re not chasing perfection, we’re chasing presence.

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Why This Matters

At first glance, letting your kids bang on pots and pans might seem like nothing more than a noisy way to kill a few minutes. And yeah, sometimes it is.

But something else is happening in those moments.

Something important.

Especially for little kids, who don’t just hear the noise. They feel it. They explore it. They learn from it.

Because when toddlers and preschoolers make music, even if it’s chaotic, unstructured, and more clatter than composition, their brains are lighting up in ways that support all kinds of critical development.

And when you zoom in a little closer, it’s easy to see just how much is happening beneath the surface. From motor skills to emotional regulation, music taps into some of the most important areas of early development.

So what’s actually going on when your kid starts banging on a mixing bowl like it’s a snare drum? A lot more than you might think.

1. It builds motor skills and coordination

When my 18-month-old picks up a wooden spoon and starts banging it against a pot, she’s not just making noise. She’s practicing movement patterns that will lay the groundwork for bigger physical skills later.

Every time she grips the handle, switches hands, or tries to hit the pot in a specific spot, she’s refining her fine motor control, grip strength, and hand-eye coordination. These are the same foundational skills she’ll rely on later when she learns to draw, write, dress herself, or climb stairs without falling over.

The CDC’s Developmental Milestone Guide lists actions like stacking blocks, using utensils, and manipulating small objects as key benchmarks for toddlers aged 12 to 36 months. A kitchen band hits those exact targets—but in a way that’s playful, sensory-rich, and totally self-directed.

The bottom line? When kids make music with their bodies, they're not just playing—they’re building control, precision, and confidence in what those little bodies can do.

2. It boosts cognitive development

Music is full of hidden learning opportunities, especially for toddlers.

When a child taps a repeating rhythm or tries to follow a pattern you set, they’re exploring sequencing, timing, and cause and effect. That’s not just fun, it’s math. It’s logic. It’s early executive function in action.

When a child taps out a rhythm or dances to a beat, they're doing more than just having fun. They're engaging in activities that enhance their cognitive development.

Research from the National Library of Medicine indicates that musical experiences, particularly those involving rhythm and melody, can positively influence language acquisition, including aspects like semantic processing and grammar. This connection between music and language suggests that early musical engagement can support the development of essential communication skills.​

And here’s the best part: kids don’t need structured lessons or tiny pianos to get those benefits. A pot, a spoon, and a beat to follow are enough to get the gears turning.

3. It encourages emotional expression and regulation

Big feelings come fast and often in toddlerhood, and not every child has the words to name them, much less process them. But sound? Rhythm? Movement? That’s a language most toddlers speak fluently.

Music gives kids a safe outlet for expressing feelings, whether they’re happy, frustrated, excited, or overwhelmed. A loud, fast rhythm might be their way of saying, “I’m full of energy!” A slow, soft beat might mean they’re winding down or feeling calm. Either way, music helps externalize emotions that might otherwise stay bottled up or come out in less constructive ways.

The National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC) notes that musical experiences can also support emotional regulation, especially when parents participate. When you mirror your child’s tempo, change the rhythm with them, or simply play alongside them, you’re helping them feel seen, validated, and in control of their own emotional experience.

In other words, music doesn’t just teach kids how to feel. It teaches them how to live with those feelings.

4. It strengthens our bond

The research is clear: making music with your kids deepens your connection with them. But honestly, I don’t need a study to tell me that.

I feel it every time my daughter starts a beat and I copy her. Every time she hands me a spoon like we’re both in the band. Every time we look at each other and laugh at the same off-beat clang.

Engaging in shared musical activities with your child does more than create joyful moments. It fosters deeper emotional connections and enhances the parent-child bond. A study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that parents frequently used music during the COVID-19 pandemic to regulate emotions and strengthen social connections with their children. These musical interactions were associated with increased feelings of closeness and improved emotional well-being for both parents and children.

It turns out that rhythm doesn’t just synchronize our bodies, it syncs up our relationships too.

The research is compelling. But honestly? The real reason I want to do this has nothing to do with data. It’s the look on my daughter’s face when she starts a beat and we all follow her lead.

It’s the moment she realizes she can create something, and we’re right there with her.

That’s what matters.

What I’m Worried About

I want to say this is going to go great.

I want to say both kids will be smiling and laughing, we’ll all be perfectly in sync, and we’ll end the session with high fives and a sense of deep emotional connection.

But here’s what I’m actually expecting:

• My 18-month-old might lose interest in two minutes and start trying to eat the shaker.

• My 4-year-old might want to control everything, including what we play, who plays what, and how loud we can be.

• Someone will definitely get bonked in the head with a spoon.

• And at some point, I’ll probably get overwhelmed and want to call it quits.

That’s the honest version.

Because activities like this sound fun on paper, but in reality, they’re messy, unpredictable, and way more chaotic than you imagine when you’re writing the plan.

And I think that’s the point.

This isn’t a Pinterest-perfect moment. It’s a practice of showing up. In letting go of how it should go and staying present with how it actually goes.

Even if it only lasts five minutes, even if we all melt down at the end, I’m showing up for it.

Because sometimes, being present is the most radical thing we can do as dads.

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What I Think Will Go Well

Despite all the possible meltdowns and mid-song spoon drops, I have a feeling there will be at least one moment where everything clicks.

Maybe it’ll be when both girls start drumming in sync. Or when my 4-year-old makes up a song on the spot and insists we all sing along. Or when the toddler giggles so hard she can’t hold onto her whisk anymore.

It probably won’t be smooth. But I think it will be real.

And that’s what I’m holding onto.

I think my older daughter will love being the “leader” and coming up with ideas. She thrives when she’s in charge of something creative. I think my younger daughter, even if she doesn’t fully understand what we’re doing, will love being included. She loves movement. She loves sound. And most of all, she loves being near us.

And me? I think I’ll surprise myself. Because when I put my phone away, ignore the clock, and let myself just play, I usually walk away feeling better than I did going in.

So no, this won’t be a perfectly composed family jam session. But it will be ours.

And honestly? That’s enough.

Why I’m Doing This

There are a hundred things I could be doing instead.

Laundry that needs folding. Emails I haven’t answered. Half-written projects sitting on my laptop. And yeah, if I’m being honest, sometimes the idea of just turning on a show and zoning out sounds really tempting.

But I’m doing this because I want my kids to remember something else.

I want them to remember a dad who got on the floor. Who picked up a spatula and joined the chaos. Who didn’t care if the rhythm was off or the song made no sense. Who played.

I’m not doing this to go viral on social media. I’m not doing it because I think my kids are going to be musical prodigies. I’m doing it because the moments that matter usually look small from the outside.

But from the inside? They feel big.

The truth is, I’m doing this for them, and for me. Because I want to feel more connected. More present. More in it.

And even if this kitchen band experiment ends in a noise-induced headache and a tangle of wooden spoons, I’ll still be glad I tried.

Because this is the kind of dad I want to be. And sometimes, you don’t find that version of yourself by reading another parenting book.

Sometimes, you find it in the middle of a homemade drum circle.

Want to Try This Too?

If you’ve been craving something simple, screen-free, and full of laughter, this is your sign to give it a try. You don’t need musical talent. You don’t need fancy instruments. You just need a kitchen, a couple of willing kids, and the courage to embrace a little chaos.

To make it even easier, I put together two free downloads you can use right away:

• 6 Musical Prompts for Toddlers: These quick, engaging ideas will help you keep the rhythm going when attention spans get short.

  

  6 Musical Prompts For Toddlers

  2.02MB ∙ PDF file

  Download

  Download

• Printable Concert Poster Template: This is a fun way to make your band feel official (and give your kids something to color after the jam session ends).

  

  Band Poster Template

  142KB ∙ PDF file

  Download

  Download

Try it out. Get loud. Let your kids take the lead. And don’t worry about how it sounds. Focus on how it feels.

Then check back at the end of the week. I’ll share a full recap of how it went for us—what worked, what didn’t, and what surprised me most.

In the meantime, I’d love to hear what your family band is called. What’s your go-to kitchen instrument? (Personally, I think the mixing bowl is the unsung hero of toddler percussion.)

Let’s make some noise, make some memories, and maybe even start a new family tradition.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the direction of The Screen-Free Dad lately. Not because I’m changing what this project is about, but because I want it to be more focused, more useful, and more consistent for you and for me.

At its core, this space has always been about real-time parenting without screens. It’s about the messy, meaningful, and magical experiences that happen when we put our phones away and pay attention. I’ve written about the big picture stuff—the hidden cost of screen time, the value of boredom, and the way everyday tasks shape our kids’ minds.

But I want to take things a step further. I want to give you something you can rely on. Something that makes trying screen-free activities feel less overwhelming and more doable. Something that isn’t just a list of ideas, but a weekly rhythm you can follow.

So here’s what I’m doing.

Starting now, I’m introducing a new format to The Screen-Free Dad. Every week, I’ll share two posts:

1. At the beginning of the week, I’ll introduce a screen-free idea I plan to try with my kids. This post will explain why it’s worth trying, what research says about it, and how I’m planning to do it.
   

2. At the end of the week, I’ll follow up with a recap of how it went. I’ll share what worked, what didn’t, and how I might adjust things next time. I’ll also include tips for trying it with different ages, different personalities, or different family dynamics.

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Why This Format?

I don’t want to just talk about screen-free parenting. I want to model it.

There are already a thousand blog posts out there offering 27 screen-free activities for toddlers or the top 10 educational games that don’t involve a screen. And don’t get me wrong, those can be helpful. But what’s missing from most of them is the follow-through. The part where someone actually tries it, reflects on it, and shows you what it looks like in real life.

That’s what I want to offer here.

I want you to see what happens when a real dad tries to make a cardboard box into a spaceship, or when he sets out to spend an hour at the park and ends up with mud on his jeans and a toddler meltdown halfway through. I want you to hear about the activities that actually created connection, and the ones that fell completely flat.

Because screen-free parenting isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence. And presence takes practice.

What You Can Expect

Here’s how the new weekly rhythm will work:

Early Week Post: The Plan

Each Monday, I’ll publish a post introducing the activity I’m planning to try. These posts will be practical, research-backed, and clear. In each post, I’ll break down:

• What the activity is

• Why I’m choosing it

• What benefits it offers (backed by child development research when possible)

• What supplies I (or you) will need

• How I plan to set it up or explain it to my kids

• Any concerns I have going in (because let’s be honest, not everything sounds like a good idea on paper)

I’ll also include a simple checklist or breakdown, and whenever it makes sense, I’ll add a free downloadable to make it even easier to try it with your own kids.

End of Week Post: The Recap

Each Friday, I’ll follow up with a post about how it went. These will be honest, reflective, and probably a little messy. Just like parenting.

I’ll talk about:

• What actually happened

• What worked and what didn’t

• How my kids responded

• What I’d change next time

• How to adapt it for younger or older kids

• Any unexpected benefits or lessons I learned along the way

Sometimes it’ll be a win. Sometimes it’ll be a total bust. But every time, it’ll be real.

Why This Matters

The more I talk to other dads, the more I realize most of us aren’t looking for more information.

We’re looking for clarity.

We’re not short on parenting tips, Instagram posts, or viral TikToks about what we should be doing. What we’re short on is confidence.

Confidence that what we’re doing makes sense.
Confidence that we’re doing it the right way.
Confidence that our kids are getting the most out of the activity.
And confidence that we are showing up enough for our kids.

This format is my way of trying to close these gaps.

It’s not about creating a perfect plan and expecting it to go perfectly. It’s about trying something new, seeing what happens, and learning from it.

It’s about showing up on a Tuesday afternoon and deciding to build a giant pillow fort because you read about it here on Monday and thought, “Why not?”

It’s about reading the recap on Friday night and realizing that someone else’s chaos looks a lot like your own, and that maybe, just maybe, you’re doing better than you think.

Because trust me, you are.

How You Can Get Involved

If you want to follow along each week, subscribe to the newsletter. You’ll get both posts delivered right to your inbox.

If you try the activity with your own kids, I’d love to hear how it went. Leave a comment, send an email, or share your story in The Screen-Free Dad group chat (coming soon).

Eventually, I’d love to turn this into more than just me sharing my story. I want this to become a community of dads who together are all trying things, learning, and figuring out how to be more present.

But for now, it starts with this new rhythm.

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One Idea. One Week. One Honest Story.

So that’s the plan.

I’ll still share the occasional longer essay or reflection and post about things like fatherhood mindset shifts, working from home, and what it means to raise kids in a digital world. But this new format will be the heart of The Screen-Free Dad moving forward.

Because I believe in the power of showing up. I believe in learning by doing. And I believe that some of the best parenting breakthroughs don’t come from expert advice.

They come from trying something new, failing a little, laughing a lot, and trying again next week.

Let’s do that. Together.

Thanks for being here.

We drove up to Northern California late last week to visit my in-laws. It was nothing big or dramatic—just a regular family visit.

But something about these trips always feels a little different.

The pace slows down.
The schedule softens.
Meals stretch out longer than usual, and conversations come a little easier.

In the mornings, someone’s usually in the kitchen early, working on breakfast or just sitting at the table.

The house is quiet in a way that makes you want to stay quiet, too.

Phones stay put. The TV doesn’t come on. Everyone just seems to show up.

It’s not something we really plan or talk about, it just kind of happens. And I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we don’t get to see each other all that often. Because we live in different states, we really only get to see each other a few days here and there.

So when we are together, we pay attention, set things down, and make the most of it.

At some point, I started wondering why it felt so easy to be present here when it felt so hard at home.

We see our kids every day and are constantly around each other. But because that time feels unlimited, it’s easy to let it slip by. We pull out our phones, turn on the TV, and let the day pass without really noticing it.

But just because something is daily doesn’t mean it’s endless.

This visit made me realize how quickly these years with our kids go by and how easy it is to treat them like background noise instead of something we only get for a little while.

We already know how to be present when the time feels limited but for some reason it feels harder when our time feels unlimited. And the more I thought about it the more I realized this isn’t about perfection or big changes. It’s just about noticing more often, and making a few small choices that help us show up in the same way on an ordinary Tuesday as we do during a special visit.

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The Specialness of Scarcity

Why We’re Present with Extended Family

There’s something about time with extended family that feels a little more intentional. Maybe it’s because we only get a few days together every so often, so we naturally treat those moments like they matter more.

Psychologists call this the “scarcity principle.”

The idea is simple: we place more value on things that are rare or limited. When something feels scarce—like time with grandparents or cousins we don’t see often—we tend to give it our full attention.

We sit down and talk. We make eye contact. We plan meals. We take walks. We play games.

The distractions are still there, but they don’t pull as hard and it’s easier to stay off our phones and show up when we know the visit will be over in a few days.

Contrast With Everyday Life

But it’s different when we’re at home. We’re around each other all the time, so the urgency fades. Familiarity can make us a little less careful with how we spend our time.

Instead of treating the day like something to pay attention to, we go into autopilot. We multitask. We check our phones. We turn on the TV. And even though we’re technically spending time together, we’re not always really together.

When was the last time you measured your screen time on your phone? If you haven’t checked it in a while, I recommend you do so. It is incredibly eye-opening to see how much time you actually spend on screens when you aren’t paying attention.

And what’s more important is understanding those hours of attention we’re giving to something else while our kids are right in front of us. It doesn’t happen all at once. It adds up in small moments—checking a text during breakfast, scrolling while the kids play nearby, zoning out to a show after dinner.

None of it feels like a big deal in the moment. But over time, that kind of passive distraction quietly replaces presence. And the days start slipping by without us really noticing.

The Illusion of Unlimited Time

It’s easy to assume we have plenty of time. We see our kids every day, and there’s always tomorrow, or the weekend, or next summer. That rhythm can feel endless—until we’re reminded it’s not.

I remember one evening in particular. It had been a typical day, the kind that moves quickly without anything especially memorable. After the kids were in bed, I realized I couldn’t recall many details. We’d all been home. We’d eaten together. But I had been distracted—tired, half-focused, probably on my phone more than I meant to be. The day had passed like a blur.

Screens can do that. They fill the gaps, smooth over the noise, and suddenly it’s bedtime and we’re not sure where the time went.

That’s part of why the 936 weekends idea stays with me.

If a child lives at home until they’re 18, that’s 936 Saturdays.

Some of those weekends have been incredible. Others are quiet. A few, probably chaotic. But all of them count, whether or not we notice them in the moment.

For me, it’s not about adding pressure to make each one magical. It’s just a gentle reminder to look up a little more often. To be where I am. To choose the board game, the walk, the silly story—something small and real.

Not because the time is running out, but because it’s still here.

Reframing Our Daily Lives: Treat Every Day Like a Visit

When extended family comes to visit, we naturally shift how we spend our time. We plan meals. We sit a little longer at the table. We pull out games we haven’t played in a while or go on walks we usually put off. It’s not because those activities are hard to access, but because we know the visit is temporary. We want to make it count.

What if we approached our time with our kids the same way?

Imagine you only had three days with them. What would you do? What would you want to remember?

That mindset doesn’t require dramatic changes. It can start with a few small, screen-free traditions that bring everyone into the same space:

• Telling family stories at bedtime

• Playing a board game or card game after dinner

• Taking a walk together in the evening

• Baking something simple on the weekend

• Listening to music and folding laundry side by side

• Sitting down for breakfast together without any screens nearby

These are simple things, but they’re often the first to go when we assume time is abundant.

Treating just one night a week like a “family visit” can shift the rhythm of your home. No devices, no rushing, just being together on purpose.

Prioritize Presence Over Convenience

Screens are easy to reach for when we’re tired. They offer a quick break, a moment of quiet, a distraction that doesn’t ask much from us. And in moderation, that’s fine. The challenge is when convenience turns into habit.

It doesn’t take long for a quick scroll to become a lost evening. Or for screen time to replace those small, quiet windows when connection might have happened.

Even short screen-free moments can make a difference. You don’t have to plan an entire unplugged weekend. Just look for a few pockets in the day and treat them as chances to be together.

Things like:

• A short walk around the block after dinner

• Drawing or building something together for ten minutes

• Reading a chapter from a book instead of turning on the TV

• Sitting outside for a snack or some fresh air

And when your kids say they’re bored, that’s not a problem to fix. It’s an invitation. Boredom often opens the door to creativity, conversation, or rest. It’s the space where connection can start, if we’re willing to let it.

The more we choose that space, the more natural it becomes. Not forced, not perfect—just present.

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Practical Shifts That Help

Build “Intentional Time” Into Daily Life

It’s one thing to talk about being more present. It’s another to actually build it into the rhythm of a regular week. But when connection becomes part of the routine, it stops feeling like something we have to squeeze in and starts feeling like something we simply do.

That doesn’t mean overhauling your schedule. Most of the time, it just means noticing a few key moments in the day—times when you’re already together—and choosing to make those moments count.

Some simple daily rituals might include:

• Eating dinner together without any devices on the table

• Sharing one thing you're grateful for each night before bed

• Starting the morning with a few minutes of cuddles, stories, or quiet time

• Letting your kids help with a chore while you talk together

And for weekly rhythms, you might try:

• A screen-free Saturday morning tradition

• An afternoon hike or walk in a nearby park

• A dedicated hour of device-free playtime

• Making a meal together from start to finish

For more inspiration, GlobalDayOfUnplugging.org has a great list of 200+ screen-free activities you can try with your family.

Another helpful tool we use at home is a boredom box. It’s a simple container filled with ready-to-go activity prompts—drawing ideas, mini-challenges, movement games, conversation starters, and more. When the kids say they’re bored or you feel stuck in a scroll-habit moment, you can pull out the box and let it guide you into something more engaging.

It’s not fancy, but it works. It also helps remove the mental load of figuring out what to do next.

Need a little help getting started?

Download the free Boredom Box guide for ready-to-use prompts and instructions for building your own Boredom Box:

How To Build A Boredom Box

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When we build these kinds of patterns into our days, they become easier to return to. They don’t have to be big or perfect. They just need to show up often enough that they start to feel like home.

A Love Letter to the Ordinary Days

The Takeaway

The time is already there.

We don’t have to carve out something extra or chase down more hours in the day. We’re already living alongside the people who matter most. We already sit at the same tables, share the same rooms, and pass each other in the hall. What’s missing isn’t time. It’s the way we see it.

We treat time with extended family like it’s sacred because it’s rare. But the time with our kids is just as precious, even if it doesn’t feel that way in the moment. The routine, the everyday, the ordinary is where most of life happens. And that’s where connection can happen, too, if we let it.

An Invitation

So here’s a small question to carry with you into the rest of today:

What would change if you treated tonight’s dinner like it was the only one you’d get this month?

Would the phones stay in a drawer? Would the conversation last a little longer? Would you notice something about your child you hadn’t seen before?

We don’t need to make every meal or moment extraordinary. But we can choose to treat them like they matter—because they do.

Final Reflection

None of us gets this right every time. Screens are part of life. Distractions happen. Some days feel too long, and others seem to have disappeared before we had a chance to enjoy them.

But each time we choose presence—especially the kind that comes when screens are set aside—we make space for something more lasting: a memory, a connection, and a story our kids will carry with them long after these days are over.

The Myth of the Screen-Free Sick Day

The fever had just hit. My daughter was curled up on the couch, red-cheeked and glassy-eyed, with a blanket wrapped around her like a burrito.

She gave the smallest whimper and asked for “Bluey.”

I didn’t hesitate. I grabbed the remote, turned on the TV, and plopped next to her.

Five minutes later, she was calm.

Ten minutes later, I was scrolling through my phone.

And what felt like twenty minutes after that, turned out to be a few hours, and I had realized the entire afternoon was gone.

That moment has played out more than once in our house. And I imagine probably in yours, too.

When your kid is sick, everything shifts.

The usual rules? Out the window.

The routines? Forgotten.

You’re just trying to make it through the day with some kind of peace. And in those moments, screens feel like a lifeline. They quiet the whining, distract from the discomfort, and buy you a breather.

So let me say this right up front:

This post isn’t here to wag a finger. I’m not handing out gold stars for perfect screen-free records. I’ve lost count of how many sick days we’ve spent huddled under a blanket watching TV.

But I’ve been wondering lately:

Even when a full screen-free day feels impossible, could we still aim for a day when we’re off more than on?

Not perfect. Not zero-screens. Just… tilted in a different direction. Less autoplay. More presence.

Maybe even a little less guilt.

That’s what I want to explore here. What it actually looks like. And what it looks like to try.

So let’s get into it.

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Why Sick Days Are Different

When your child is sick, the day shifts. No errands. No plans. Productivity gets tossed aside like a half-used tissue. You're in survival mode, and you’re forced to worry less about checking things off a list, more about just making it to bedtime.

Letting your kid watch TV or play on a tablet when they're sniffling and half-asleep feels like a kindness. But for many parents, that kindness comes with a side of guilt. A University of Michigan survey found that 73% of parents feel guilty about their child’s screen time, and nearly half report feeling moderate to intense guilt about it.

And honestly, that guilt comes from a good place. We all know the science, and we’re all actively trying to create better screen-time routines and schedules. So I’m not here to say that those feelings are wrong, we just need to check ourselves and give ourselves a little grace during times like this.

Because let’s get real, parenting is a lot of work, but parenting sick kids is an exceptional amount of work. Especially if you work remotely or have a long list of chores needing to be completed.

But let’s remember, both pediatricians and child development experts agree—what matters most isn’t a perfect screen-free record.

It’s being intentional, not reactive.

Occasional screen-heavy days don’t erase your efforts on screen-free days. So on days like this, give yourself some grace and always remember:

You can’t do better than your best.

So try your best and keep moving forward. Sick days do alter your screen-free goals, but they don’t completely stop them. You’re goal for the day should be more off than on.

What “More Off Than On” Actually Looks Like

Instead of aiming for zero screen time, try shifting your focus to the overall direction of the day.

Are you moving toward connection, rest, and care, or just defaulting to whatever keeps things quiet?

“More off than on” gives you a gentler target and allows for flexibility without losing intention.

One way to do this is by planning your day around screen “anchors.”

Think of a show or short movie as a marker, not the main event.

After an episode, you might bring your child a cozy blanket and a few books, or set them up with a snack and some open-ended toys on the couch. The idea is to create a calm, screen-free buffer after the screen is off.

The length doesn’t have to match, it just needs to feel like the screen isn’t running the entire day.

The pace of the day matters, too. There’s no need to follow a rigid schedule, but having a loose rhythm can keep you both from getting stuck in back-to-back viewing. It also helps avoid the endless cycle of autoplay, which is easy to fall into when nobody’s keeping track of time.

Another piece of the puzzle is reading your kid’s energy.

A kid with a fever might not be up for much. For kids who are extra tired, screen-free time might look like lying together quietly, flipping through a picture book, or even just talking about their stuffed animals. Quiet presence counts.

If they’re a bit more alert, that’s when you can offer simple, low-effort options: stickers, magnetic drawing boards, or soft music and a flashlight for shadow play.

You can also think in terms of small transitions. Before a show starts, ask your kid to pick out a blanket or find their favorite toy to hold. After it ends, offer a snack or a change of scenery—maybe just moving from the couch to the kitchen table.

These small, screen-free shifts add up, and they make it easier to avoid the “just one more episode” trap.

More off than on doesn’t require a master plan. It just asks that we pay attention to the moments in between. Those in-between moments—the ones that happen when the screen clicks off and you both take a breath—are often the ones we will remember most.

Low-Energy, Screen-Free Sick Day Activities

This isn’t the day for Pinterest-worthy activities or themed sensory bins with handmade felt pieces. Sick days are about keeping things simple for them and for you.

“Screen-free” doesn’t have to mean high effort. It just means looking for moments that don’t involve a screen—and offering your kid something quiet, comforting, and easy in its place.

Here are a few ideas that have worked well in our house:

• Audio stories or podcasts: Pop on a cozy story while your child rests. There are great options out there made just for kids: gentle voices, short episodes, and calming themes. No visuals, no overstimulation, just a quiet way to pass the time. Circle Round, Stories Podcast, and Little Stories for Tiny People are solid picks.
  

• Picture books or flip-through books: Not every sick kid is up for a full-on read-aloud. That’s okay. Leave out a small stack of books with big pictures—board books, lift-the-flap books, or even photo albums and let them flip through at their own pace.
  

• Shadow puppets with a flashlight: Turn off the lights, shine a flashlight on the wall, and move your hands around. It’s five minutes of wonder with zero prep. You can even make up a silly story as you go or invite them to guess what shapes you’re trying to make.
  

• Cuddling and storytelling: This might be the most underrated screen-free activity of all. Snuggle up and tell them a story. It doesn’t have to be a masterpiece. It can be simple. A tale about their favorite stuffed animal, a story from your own childhood, or a made-up adventure that starts with “Once upon a time, there was a sick little dragon who only felt better when he ate pancakes…”
  

• Mess-free coloring: If your child has a bit of energy but isn’t quite up for toys, hand them a water painting pad or one of those magic marker coloring books that only show up on special paper. Or just regular crayons and a coloring book. Zero mess, minimal effort, quiet engagement.
  

• Let them “help” you cook from the couch: If you’re making soup or toast or even just reheating something, narrate the steps to them like you’re on a cooking show. “Now I’m adding the carrots… do you think I should add a little more salt?” They don’t have to move. They just get to feel involved.
  

• A magic bed picnic: Lay out a towel or tray on the bed or couch, and let them eat something fun and simple in their nest of pillows and blankets. A few grapes, crackers, or even just some toast cut into shapes. Turn it into a tiny event and let it stretch a little longer than usual.

The point here isn’t to fill every moment. It’s to have a few tools in your pocket so the screen doesn’t have to be the only option. If you do one or two of these in a day, you’re already doing more than enough.

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Pitfalls (and Permission Slips)

Even when you’re doing your best to tip the balance toward “more off than on,” sick days can still trip you up. Plans fall apart. Moods shift. Schedules go sideways. That’s just how it goes.

Here are a few common pitfalls—and the permission slips that come with them:

Pitfall 1: The All-or-Nothing Mindset

This is the big one. You start the day thinking, We’re going to make it screen-free all day. And then by 9:17 a.m., you’ve already turned on a show. The day feels like a loss. So you figure, What’s one more episode? Then another. Then another.

But here’s the thing: using screens for part of the day doesn’t cancel out your effort. Just because the morning was screen-heavy doesn’t mean the afternoon has to be. You can turn things around at any point. You can press pause on the show and bring out a blanket and a book. You can offer a snack and sit next to them instead of reaching for the remote. These shifts don’t need to be dramatic; they just need to happen once in a while.

Pitfall 2: Competing Needs

Sick days rarely happen in a vacuum. One kid is miserable on the couch, and the other one is dressed like a dinosaur and demanding to go outside. You’re stuck in the middle, trying to be two parents at once—and possibly still working a job or managing a house on top of that.

In these moments, screens can buy you space. Use them as “islands”—short, intentional breaks that help you meet one child’s needs while still being available to the other. Maybe the sick kid watches a 20-minute show while you build LEGOs with their sibling. Maybe the healthy one gets a cartoon break while you cuddle the feverish one with an audiobook playing in the background. You’re not giving up, you’re just spacing things out, shifting your energy, and doing the best you can with the time you’ve got.

Pitfall 3: Guilt Over Screens

It sneaks in. Even when you know better. Even when you’ve made peace with screen time in theory, there’s that quiet little voice saying,

“You should have done more.”

“You should have tried harder.”

But guilt doesn’t help. Reflection does.

Ask yourself instead:

• What actually worked today?

• What didn’t?

• What felt good for me and for them?

Maybe the show gave you a quiet moment to clean up breakfast. Maybe the podcast helped your kid fall asleep. Maybe that extra movie meant you didn’t lose your temper. That’s worth noticing.

You don’t need perfection. You need grace. And on sick days, grace looks like small efforts, honest intentions, and a little softness for them and for yourself.

The Real Goal: Connection, Not Perfection

Sick days aren’t for achievements. They’re for slowing down, staying close, and giving yourself permission to not do it all.

That doesn’t mean throwing structure out the window. But it does mean lowering the bar.

Screens can play a role in that slower rhythm. They can give you a breather, help your child settle, and make the day feel a little more manageable. And that’s okay. But they don’t have to be the main event. They don’t have to run the entire day.

The real goal—especially on days like this—isn’t some perfect balance of screen time and activities. It’s connection. A few small moments where you’re present. A few quiet pauses that don’t revolve around a glowing screen. If you’re making an effort, you’re doing better than you think. If you’re noticing when the screen takes over, you’re already ahead of the curve.

Just try to be off more than on. That’s enough.

Picture this:

Your kid is on the couch, half-asleep, their head resting on your arm. There’s soft music playing in the background. A storybook lies open on the blanket between you—maybe you read it out loud, maybe you didn’t finish it. Maybe they watched a movie earlier. Maybe another one’s coming later.

But right now? Right now, it’s quiet. The TV is off. You’re just there.

Together.

And that’s the kind of moment that matters.

Why We Need to Raise Problem-Solvers

The other day, I watched my 4-year-old unroll the entire roll of toilet paper just to get the toilet paper roll.

She then took the toilet paper roll, put it in the sink, soaked it, and laid it out to dry.

Once it was dry, she painted it, covered it in tape, and used it as a telescope to find stars and planets.

I stood there watching, equal parts impressed and marveling at the logic behind her choices.

She saw a problem.

She scanned her environment.

And she got to work.

Kids do this all the time. They experiment, adapt, test weird ideas, and invent even weirder ones.

They’re natural problem-solvers.

And this got me thinking:

What if we gave our kids more chances to stretch those problem-solving muscles?

Not with lectures. Not with worksheets. But with something way more powerful—games.
Simple, screen-free, brain-boosting games that invite kids to think differently, try again, and enjoy the process.

Below, I’m sharing a handful of our favorites. No batteries required. Just a little curiosity, a little time, and some childlike curiosity.

But before we get into the games, let’s dive into the research.

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What Problem-Solving Looks Like in Kids

Imagine a child meticulously experimenting with various configurations to build a taller block tower, inventing new rules to enhance a card game, or persistently asking "What if?" to explore different scenarios. These behaviors exemplify critical thinking in children, manifesting as curiosity, persistence, pattern recognition, and the willingness to try again after failures.​

Critical thinking in children involves the ability to analyze information, make connections, and solve problems creatively. It's about nurturing their capacity to think independently and approach challenges with confidence. Encouraging children to agree or disagree with ideas and provide reasons for their opinions fosters critical thinking by prompting them to evaluate information critically.

The goal isn't to mold "little geniuses" but to equip our children with the tools to think critically, problem-solve, and navigate the world effectively.

Developing these skills in children builds confidence as they learn to persist through challenges and find solutions, fostering a sense of capability and resilience.

And the best thing is that it also enhances creativity.

When children tackle various scenarios, they learn to think outside the box, consider multiple perspectives, and develop innovative approaches. This creative problem-solving ability is crucial for adapting to new situations and overcoming obstacles throughout life.

In essence, fostering critical thinking and problem-solving skills in children not only prepares them to handle immediate challenges but also equips them with the confidence, resilience, and creativity necessary for lifelong success.

So how do we actually nurture those skills?

Not with flashcards or formal lessons but through something much simpler and much more effective: play.

So I’ve put together 6 games that are easy to set up, fun to revisit, and surprisingly powerful when it comes to helping kids stretch those critical thinking muscles. Lets get into it.

Game 1: What’s Missing?

How to Play:

• Gather a collection of household items (e.g., a spoon, a toy car, a book).

• Allow your child to observe the items for a minute.

• Ask them to close their eyes while you remove one item.

• Have them identify which item is missing.

What It Teaches:

This classic game strengthens memory and observation skills, helping children recognize patterns and retain details. These are foundational skills for critical thinking and cognitive development. Memory games support focus, spatial reasoning, and mental flexibility in children.

Game 2: Build It, Break It

How to Play:

• Provide materials like blocks, plastic cups, or paper to build a structure.

• Challenge your child to construct the tallest or most stable structure possible.

• Once built, brainstorm safe ways to knock it down from a distance (like tossing a sock).

What It Teaches:

This game promotes experimentation, cause-and-effect thinking, and iteration. As kids build and rebuild, they learn to plan, adjust, and analyze outcomes. Open-ended play like this enhances decision-making, spatial awareness, and flexible thinking.

Game 3: Category Clash

How to Play:

• Pick a broad category (animals, fruits, vehicles).

• Challenge your child to name three items that fit a specific constraint (e.g., “Name three animals that live in water and are scary”).

What It Teaches:

This simple thinking game supports categorization, vocabulary development, and cognitive flexibility. It also encourages divergent thinking—finding more than one “right” answer. Category-based games help children improve their reasoning and verbal expression skills.

Game 4: Puzzle Swap

How to Play:

• Grab two similar jigsaw puzzles.

• Secretly swap one piece between them.

• Ask your child to complete the puzzles and spot the issue.

What It Teaches:

This challenge supports visual logic and problem-solving. Kids must spot visual inconsistencies and troubleshoot how to fix them. Puzzles help children develop short-term memory, pattern recognition, and shape-matching abilities.

Game 5: One Problem, Three Solutions

How to Play:

• Present a fun problem (e.g., “Your stuffed animal fell in a puddle!”).

• Challenge your child to come up with three different ways to fix the situation.

What It Teaches:

This game strengthens creative problem-solving and flexible thinking. It teaches kids there’s often more than one path forward. PositivePsychology.com lists this type of open-ended challenge as one of the most effective ways to support cognitive growth and self-confidence in kids.

Game 6: Code a Path

How to Play:

• Use masking tape to create a simple grid on the floor.

• Place a toy at one end of the grid.

• Have your child give step-by-step commands to help a “robot” (you or another toy) reach it.

What It Teaches:

This activity introduces sequencing, logical reasoning, and basic “if-then” thinking. It’s a playful introduction to programming concepts and computational logic.

Try Them for Yourself

Remember, the beauty of games like these is you don’t need a perfect plan. You just need a moment.

Pick one of these games. Try it today.

It doesn’t have to be polished or even go that smoothly. It just needs a few minutes, a little space, and the willingness to play along.

This isn’t about raising a future chess champion or programming prodigy. It’s about raising a child who isn’t afraid to think, to try, to get it wrong, and to try again. A child who trusts their own ideas and knows you do too.

And maybe, in the process, you’ll find something for yourself as well.

Fatherhood is made up of small, fleeting moments—the kind that don’t always feel significant at the time but, looking back, define the journey. Reflections of a Dad is a new weekly series where I revisit memories from my own fatherhood experience—stories of laughter, lessons, and the little things that matter most. Every Wednesday, I’ll share a snapshot from the past, a moment that stuck with me, and what it taught me about being a dad.

This week, a tribute to the exhausted dads.

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There's a peculiar kind of tiredness that seeps into your bones when you're a dad. It's not the satisfying fatigue after a long hike or the drowsiness that follows a big meal. No, this is a weariness that lingers, day after day, like a shadow you can't shake. It's a constant companion, whispering in your ear, making simple tasks feel like monumental challenges.

In my world, it's a cacophony of needs and demands. My 4-year-old, a whirlwind of energy and questions, requires constant engagement.

"Why is the sky blue?" she asks for the hundredth time as I struggle to keep my eyes open.

Her curiosity is boundless, her energy inexhaustible. Just as I think I've answered all her questions, she comes up with a dozen more.

It's beautiful.
It's exhausting.
It's fatherhood.

Meanwhile, my 18-month-old babbles and toddles around. Exploring every nook and cranny of our home with reckless abandon.

She’s at that delightful yet terrifying stage where everything goes into her mouth. I find myself constantly on high alert, scanning for potential hazards, my body tensed for the next rescue mission.

The vigilance is draining but necessary and, quite frankly, a little exciting.

Sleep has become a distant memory.

A luxury I once took for granted.

Caffeine helps but only so much.

I often find myself putting milk in the pantry, searching for my phone while it’s in my hand, and realizing halfway through the day that my shirt is inside out.

Yet, in the midst of this exhaustion, there are moments of pure joy.

A toothy grin from the baby.

A spontaneous "I love you" from the toddler.

These are the sparks that keep me going, that remind me why I signed up for this beautiful chaos.

But let's be honest: it's hard.

Some days, I feel like I’m barely keeping my head above water.

The exhaustion wears down my patience, shortens my temper, and makes me less of the dad I want to be. I snap over small things and then sit in the weight of guilt, wishing I had more energy to be better.

Self-care becomes a distant concept, something I vaguely remember enjoying in my pre-dad life.

Taking a shower without interruption feels like a luxury.

Eating a meal while it's still hot? A rare treat.

Reading a book that doesn't involve talking animals or rhyming verses? A distant dream.

The physical toll is real too.

My back aches from carrying a growing baby and bending over to pick up toys.

My wrists hurt from the constant lifting, changing, feeding.

Even my jaw feels tense from clenching it in frustration or concentration throughout the day.

Fatherhood leaves its mark in ways big and small.

On our bodies.
On our minds.
On our patience.

Some days, it feels like too much, like the exhaustion might never ease. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that we’re not in this alone.

There are so many of us out there fighting the same fight you are.

There are so many of us out there who have already fought the same fight you are.

And so many of us are wondering, “Can I really do this?”

And to you all out there, remember to be kind to yourself.

Lower your standards a bit. A messy house and unwashed hair don't make you a bad dad.

Accept help when it's offered. Find moments of respite where you can, even if it's just five minutes of deep breathing while the kids are momentarily occupied.

And on those days when the fatigue feels overwhelming, when you're running on fumes and frayed nerves, remember this: you're doing an incredible job.

Your children are loved, cared for, and thriving because of you.

This season of life is challenging, but it's also fleeting.

One day, I’m sure we'll look back on these exhausting days with a mix of wonder and nostalgia, marveling at how we made it through.

Until then, let's raise our energy drinks (or wine glasses, no judgment here) in a toast to all the tired dads out there.

We may be exhausted, but we're also strong, resilient, and filled with a love so deep it makes all the sleepless nights worth it.

So here's to us, the weary warriors of fatherhood.

In my last post, I laid out the plan: Six hours in the car, six carefully planned screen-free activities, and the goal of making it through the entire drive without handing over a tablet.

I was confident.

I had a strategy.

I was ready.

And for the first three hours, everything went great.

But there was one flaw in my plan:

I didn’t anticipate how fast we’d burn through those six activities.

By the halfway point, I had nothing left. My toolbox of engaging ideas was empty, and we still had another three hours to go.

That meant a whole lot of scrambling, improvising, and, eventually, some compromise.

Some activities were big wins. Others? Not so much. And in the end, we almost made it screen-free.

But not quite.

Here’s what worked, what didn’t, and what I’ll be doing differently next time.

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How the Activities Went: Hits, Misses, and Lessons Learned

Songs & Storytelling – A Total Win

If there was an MVP of our screen-free road trip, it was music.

My wife took over as DJ—a role she’s secretly great at, thanks to her brother being a DJ. She put together a playlist that kept the energy up, matched the mood, and kept the kids engaged.

We mixed it up with:

• High-energy songs to start the trip (think classic kids' songs and singalongs).

• Some storytelling-style songs (Disney soundtracks were a hit).

• Some Green Day (because we all know that punk rock music is the best kind of music. Plus, they are HUGE proponents of limiting screen time and social media).

This lasted a full hour, which, in road trip terms, is an eternity.

Lessons for Next Time:

• Be more intentional: Curate a playlist ahead of time instead of having to rely on my wife’s DJ abilities so she can focus on having fun rather than curating a playlist on the fly.

• Adding variety: Audiobooks or podcast-style storytelling could extend this even further.

• Engage help from kids: Letting my 4-year-old help pick some of the songs would probably get her even more engaged.

Scavenger Hunt – Fun Until It Wasn’t

This was another one that started strong. My 4-year-old loved looking out the window and trying to find things on our list:

• A red car

• A cow

• A stop sign

• A truck with a trailer

She was all in.

Until she wasn’t.

After about 20 minutes, frustration took over. She wanted to find things faster than they were appearing. Every time I told her to "keep looking" or "they'll show up soon," she got more and more impatient.

Eventually, she just gave up and told me it was a "boring game."

Lessons for Next Time:

• Easier-to-find items: Some things on our list were just too rare to keep the momentum going.

• A timed challenge: Instead of a static list, we could look for as many things as possible in 5-minute rounds.

• Bingo-style format: If she gets five in a row, she gets a reward (even if it’s just a high-five).

Snack Time & Sensory Play – A Mixed Bag

Food is always a good idea on road trips. The snack part? A solid success.

Sensory play? Not so much.

For snacks, I went with a mix of:

• Something fun (fruit snacks)

• Something filling (cheese sticks & crackers)

• Something interactive (raisins they could pick out one by one)

That part worked great. The sensory play was another story.

I gave them fidget toys, thinking they’d keep little hands busy.

And they did… for about five minutes.

Then they got dropped and lost under seats, causing way more frustration than entertainment.

Lessons for Next Time:

• Tether the fidget toys to strings: That way, if they drop them, they can pull them back up.

• Rotate different types of sensory activities: Something squishy, something they can twist, something they can stack.

• Make snack time a game: Maybe next time, I’ll do a “mystery snack” where they have to guess what they’re eating.

Would You Rather/Car Interview – A Total Flop

I had high hopes for this one.

I thought it would spark conversation, keep my 4-year-old engaged, and lead to some fun, creative answers.

Instead?

She was 100% uninterested.

Looking back, I don’t think I explained it well. She didn’t really understand what she was supposed to do, and after the first question, she was already over it.

Lessons for Next Time:

• Try a different format: Instead of just asking, I could turn it into a story in which she decides what happens next.

• Give examples first: If I model how it works, she might understand it better.

• Be more strategic about timing: Trying to introduce it out of nowhere probably made it feel forced. Maybe wait until she’s already asking me questions/talking to me.

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Movement Break – Worked… Until the Rain Came

At first, everything went exactly as planned. As soon as we pulled into the park's parking lot, my 4-year-old was ready to run.

She sprinted toward the playground, climbed on the jungle gym, and started making up an elaborate game that involved running across the bridge and sliding down the biggest slide as fast as she could.

My 18-month-old was content to toddle around the grassy area, exploring her surroundings while my wife and I took turns chasing her.

Then, just 10 minutes in, the rain started.

With the movement break cut short, I switched to my backup plan: some inside-the-car stretching games. I had them reach for the ceiling, touch their toes, and do some exaggerated arm circles, but these only lasted about 15 minutes before their interest faded. At that point, they were ready for something else, and I was left scrambling for the next activity.

Lessons for Next Time:

• Find a movement game that works inside the car: The stretching exercises helped a little, but I need something more engaging. Maybe a version of Simon Says that involves moving their arms and legs or a “wiggle contest” where they try to move every part of their body while buckled in.

• Have a list of 5-minute movement games ready: That way, if our outdoor break gets cut short again, I’ll have an easy-to-reference list of fun, active ways to keep them moving without needing a ton of space.

• Find an indoor playground/play place: You could plan to eat lunch at McDonald's so the kids can play in an indoor playground without the fear of being rained out.

Quiet Time/Wind Down – Right Activity, Wrong Timing

The idea was simple: create a calm environment where my kids could relax, maybe even doze off, so the last stretch of the trip would be smooth and peaceful.

The execution? Not bad, but horribly timed.

The problem wasn’t the activity itself. It actually worked really well. I put on some soft music, dimmed the car’s interior lights, and gave my kids their favorite stuffed animals.

For about 30 minutes, things were blissfully quiet. My youngest, who had already been napping on and off, stayed asleep, and my 4-year-old snuggled up and seemed to genuinely enjoy the downshift in energy.

But there was a massive flaw in my plan: I hit quiet time too early.

We were only 2.5 hours into the trip. When quiet time ended, I still had another 2.5-3 hours to fill.

Instead of winding things down for the final stretch of the drive, I had essentially hit pause in the middle of the journey. When my daughter perked back up, I was out of pre-planned activities.

The result? She went from feeling calm and relaxed… to bored and antsy, with nothing left to keep her occupied.

Lessons for Next Time:

• Save quiet time for the final stretch: It would have been much more effective if I had waited until hour four or five. The goal should be to time it so that by the time the kids wake up or are done resting, we’re almost at our destination.

• Add a sleep-inducing playlist: The calming music helped, but I think an actual sleep-focused playlist with lullabies or white noise could have encouraged a longer nap.

• Have a “quiet time” book ready: Something my 4-year-old could flip through on her own might have extended the relaxed vibe even longer. Maybe a search-and-find book or something interactive where she could engage quietly without needing me to lead the activity.

The Verdict: Did We Make It Screen-Free?

The goal?
Make it through the entire 6-hour drive without screens.

The reality?
We lasted four hours before I caved.

For the first part of the trip, things were going surprisingly well. My 4-year-old was entertained by our planned activities, and when we ran out, she even came up with her own games to pass the time.

But as the trip wore on, boredom started creeping in. By hour four, I was officially out of ideas, and my 4-year-old was out of patience. She didn’t even have to ask very many times before I gave in and handed over the tablet.

She ended up watching shows and playing games for about two hours.

Did we completely succeed in having a screen-free trip?

No.

Was it a massive improvement from past road trips?

Absolutely!

In the past, we have leaned on screens for the entire trip. This time, we held off for two-thirds of the drive.

That’s a huge win, and it showed me that this is possible. I just need to plan a little better next time.

What I’m Changing for the Next Road Trip (California, Here We Come!)

This trip was an experiment, and it taught me a lot about what works, what doesn’t, and what I need to tweak for the future.

• WAY more activities: Six was not nearly enough. Next time, I’m aiming for at least twice as many hours as the drive is.

• Build up my own stamina: The tablet wasn’t the problem. It was me giving in too easily. By hour four, I was tired and out of ideas, so I gave in without much resistance. Next time, I want to hold out longer.

Overall, I’m counting this trip as a massive success! I learned that we can make screen-free road trips work.

We proved it’s possible to go four hours without screens, and with more preparation, we’ll be able to stretch it even further.

In two weeks, we’re hitting the road again, but this time, we’re going all the way to California. And I’m determined to go all 11 hours without screens.

I’ve already started brainstorming new activities, better movement breaks, a stronger quiet time plan, and maybe the appearance of a car trip boredom box.

In any case, I’m empowered and excited to see how it goes!

By the time you’re reading this, we’ll already be on the road. My two daughters—ages four and eighteen months—are strapped into their car seats, snacks are packed, activities are prepped, and I’m behind the wheel, hoping this six-hour drive from Utah to Idaho goes as smoothly as possible.

This isn’t the first time my wife and I have taken our kids on a long road trip. Last summer, we spent three weeks driving across the western United States, spending more than 70 hours in the car. It was an incredible trip, but I’ll be honest, I defaulted to screens way too early and way too often. The plan was always to use them as a last resort, but without fail, within the first few hours, I’d find myself reaching for the tablet just to keep the peace.

But that was the past.

This time, I want to do things differently.

I want to see if we can actually enjoy the trip itself, not just survive it. So, I’ve planned six screen-free activities, one for each hour of the drive, designed to keep our girls engaged without relying on a screen.

Will it work? I have no idea, but I’m committed to shifting my mindset and giving it a real shot.

And because I believe in full transparency, I’ll be writing a follow-up post on Monday with the results.

I’ll break down what worked, what didn’t, and why, and most importantly, I’ll let you know whether or not I actually made it the whole way without giving in to screens.

So here it is, the plan.

Six hours, six activities, and one dad determined to make this road trip different. Let’s see how it goes.

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Hour 1: The Road Trip Kickoff—Songs and Storytelling

My plan is to start strong with something both girls can engage in—singing and storytelling.

We’ll begin with classic road trip songs, keeping the energy high and making sure everyone is in a good mood at the start of the drive.

• Wheels on the Bus, Old MacDonald, and If You’re Happy and You Know It are easy choices since both girls can participate in some way.

• Let It Go will likely make an appearance, and I’ll embrace it.

• If singing starts to lose its appeal, I’ll shift to a simple storytelling game where I start a story, and my four-year-old fills in the details.

My eighteen-month-old may not fully understand the storytelling game, but she loves hearing our voices, so listening to her sister invent a story should still keep her entertained.

How to Elevate for Older Kids:

• Turn storytelling into a challenge by adding a rhyme requirement.

• Give them a creative prompt to start with, such as "Tell a story about a talking dog who finds a magic hat."

• Add a memory element by having each person repeat the last part of the story before adding their own.

Why I think this will work:

Starting with something familiar and interactive sets a positive tone for the trip. Singing keeps energy levels up, while storytelling engages creativity and helps the time pass more quickly.

Hour 2: Roadside Bingo and Scavenger Hunt

Making the drive interactive will help keep both kids engaged without relying on screens. I found a simple scavenger hunt from Mom’s Minivan that gives them something to focus on outside the car.

• My four-year-old has a visual scavenger hunt with items like a red barn, a blue truck, and a cow. She can mark off each item as she finds it, adding a small challenge to the drive.

• My eighteen-month-old won’t fully grasp the game, but I’m bringing a photo book with pictures of common road trip sights so she can match what she sees outside the window.

• When my four-year-old starts losing interest, I’ll challenge her to come up with her own categories, like “Find something round” or “Find something bigger than our car.”

How to Elevate for Older Kids:

• Introduce a points system where common items earn one point, while rare finds like a pink car or a horse earn five points.

• Give them a small notebook to sketch or write about what they see, turning it into a mini travel journal.

Why I think this will work:

This keeps their eyes on the scenery instead of zoning out. It also encourages observation skills, adds an element of competition, and helps make the passing miles more interesting.

Hour 3: Snack and Sensory Play

A well-timed snack break serves two purposes:

1. Keeping everyone full.

2. Providing a hands-on distraction to help pass the time.

I’ve packed a few interactive snack options to make this hour more engaging.

• Snack necklaces made from Cheerios and pretzels will give my four-year-old something fun to eat while keeping her occupied for a little longer.

• My eighteen-month-old will have a spill-proof snack cup filled with bite-sized food so she can feed herself without making a mess.

• To add a little surprise, my four-year-old will play “Guess the Snack,” where she has to guess what’s inside before opening her next mystery snack bag.

• For additional engagement, I packed small fidget toys and color-changing water reveal books to keep my eighteen-month-old entertained once she’s done snacking.

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How to Elevate for Older Kids:

• Let them “shop” for snacks from pre-packed options, giving them a sense of control over what they eat.

• Add a taste-test challenge where they are blindfolded and have to guess different flavors or textures.

Why I think this will work:

This combines food with hands-on play, keeping their hands busy and preventing boredom from setting in. It also introduces an element of surprise and choice, making snack time feel more like an activity than just a break.

Hour 4: Would You Rather and Car Interview Game

Keeping the conversation going is key to avoiding boredom and frustration, so this hour is all about fun questions and silly discussions.

• We’ll start with a round of “Would You Rather” questions tailored to their ages. My four-year-old will get choices like, “Would you rather be a puppy or a kitten?” while my eighteen-month-old will get simpler choices, such as “Banana or apple?”

• Once we’ve exhausted the “Would You Rather” game, we’ll switch to a “car interview” where my four-year-old gets to ask me anything she wants. Since she’s deep in the “why?” phase, I expect some truly fascinating questions.

• My eighteen-month-old will probably just babble along, but that counts as conversation too. Plus she’ll hopefully be asleep at this point.

How to Elevate for Older Kids:

• Introduce a rapid-fire trivia round with fun categories like math, state capitals, or pop culture.

• Let them create their own “Would You Rather” questions, adding an extra challenge by making them as funny or creative as possible.

Why I think this will work:

This keeps the car from getting too quiet and encourages bonding. It also gives kids control over the conversation, which can make them feel more engaged in the experience. Plus, their answers often lead to hilarious, unexpected discussions that make the trip more memorable.

Hour 5: Movement Break and Stretching Games

This is the hour I’m dreading the most because sitting still for five hours straight is tough, even for adults. I know my girls will be restless, so I have a few movement-based activities planned to help get the wiggles out.

• The best-case scenario is finding a park where they can run around and reset before we finish the last stretch of the drive.

• If stopping isn’t an option, we’ll play the “Move When You See It” game:

  • Every time we see a cow, my four-year-old will stretch her arms.

  • Every time a truck honks, my eighteen-month-old will clap.

• If they still have extra energy, we’ll play a seated “Simon Says” game in their car seats with small movements like tapping their knees or wiggling their fingers.

How to Elevate for Older Kids:

• Add challenges like “Touch your toes without unbuckling” or “Balance something on your head while sitting” to make movement breaks more interactive.

• Incorporate a competition where they try to do the most stretches or movements correctly without missing a cue.

Why I think this will work:

This helps prevent crankiness by breaking up the sitting time. Even small movements can help kids release pent-up energy, making the last part of the drive more manageable. Plus, adding an interactive element keeps them engaged instead of just feeling stuck in their seats.

Hour 6: Quiet Time and Wind Down

As we get closer to our destination, I want to shift the energy to a calmer, more relaxed pace. The goal for this last stretch is to ease out of the road trip excitement and prepare for arrival with simple, quiet activities.

• I’m bringing out coloring books and sticker pads to keep my four-year-old engaged without requiring too much effort.

• My eighteen-month-old will get a soft fabric book to flip through, giving her something soothing to focus on.

• To add a little reflection, I’ll ask my four-year-old to draw her favorite part of the trip in a simple travel journal.

• We’ll also do a quick gratitude check-in by talking about the best and funniest moments of the day.

How to Elevate for Older Kids:

• Have them write a short story or comic strip about their road trip, encouraging creativity and memory recall.

• Challenge them to draw something they saw today from memory, testing their observation skills.

Why I think this will work:

This helps transition from the road to arrival mode by creating a sense of closure for the trip. It also gives kids a way to process and reflect on the experience, making the journey feel more meaningful instead of just something to endure.

Excited, Nervous, and Ready to Put This to the Test

I’m not going to lie. I’m a little nervous.

Six hours is a long time to keep two young kids engaged without screens, and there’s a very real chance that my well-laid plans will fall apart somewhere around hour three.

But I’m also excited.

I’ve been on this journey of limiting screen time for a while now, gradually making small shifts in our daily routines. This trip feels like the perfect test to put so many of those ideas into practice.

Can we really make it the whole way without screens? Will the activities hold their attention long enough? Will I regret not packing the tablet by the second gas station stop?

I have no idea, but I’m looking forward to finding out.

So enjoy your weekend, and I’ll be back on Monday with a follow-up post, where I’ll share what worked, what didn’t, and whether I actually pulled this off.

In the meantime, I’d love to hear from you.

What are your best screen-free road trip ideas?

Drop them in the comments, and maybe I’ll even try a few out on the way back.

Fatherhood is made up of small, fleeting moments—the kind that don’t always feel significant at the time but, looking back, define the journey. Reflections of a Dad is a new weekly series where I revisit memories from my own fatherhood experience—stories of laughter, lessons, and the little things that matter most. Every Wednesday, I’ll share a snapshot from the past, a moment that stuck with me, and what it taught me about being a dad.

This week, I’m starting with a simple tradition that has become one of my favorites: Doughnut Fridays.

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Every Friday, just as the sun begins to warm the city streets, my daughter and I set out on our weekly excursion. It's nothing crazy or elaborate—just a short walk to the local bakery for doughnuts.

At three years old, my daughter approaches our Friday tradition with a mix of familiarity and fresh excitement. As we push open the bakery door, the mild sweetness of dough and sugar greets us.

The same bell chimes above our heads.

And the same friendly face behind the counter offers a nod of recognition.

We make our way to the display case, a process that's never rushed. My daughter takes her time, pressing her nose against the glass, her breath creating small clouds as she surveys the options.

There's no hurry here. We let the minutes stretch out, savoring the luxury of unhurried choice. The selection process is as much a part of our ritual as the eating itself.

Some weeks, she gravitates towards bright colors.

One with electric blue frosting, or an ungodly amount of sprinkles.

Other times, it's the classics that call her name.

A simple glazed or a chocolate-frosted ring.

Once the choice is made and the doughnut carefully placed on a plain white paper plate, we find our usual spot.

It's nothing special, just a small table by the window, but for 30 minutes every week, it's ours.

My daughter climbs onto her chair, knees bent, feet tucked under her. I watch as she approaches her doughnut with the seriousness of a scientist examining a new specimen.

The first bite is always the most ceremonial.

Sometimes there's a moment of hesitation, a brief consideration of where to start. Then, inevitably, she dives in. Frosting smears across her cheek, sprinkles scatter across the table, and the quiet of the morning is punctuated by her soft hums of appreciation.

As she eats I notice how her small hands have grown more dexterous over the months, how she's learned to navigate the messiness with increasing skill.

I see the way her eyes crinkle with pleasure at a particularly sweet bite and the slight furrow of her brow as she concentrates on not dropping a single crumb.

We don't always talk much during these sessions. Sometimes we sit in comfortable silence, the clink of cups and the low murmur of other patrons providing a gentle backdrop.

Other times, she'll regale me with stories.

Disjointed tales of adventures or elaborate fantasies involving her stuffed animals and the adventurous lives they lead.

I listen, savoring her words as much as she savors her doughnut.

As our time winds down, we engage in the usual clean-up ritual.

Napkins wipe sticky fingers and faces, and any fallen sprinkles are carefully gathered and disposed of.

We thank the staff and make our way back out onto the street, rejoining the flow of the day.

Walking home, her small hand in mine, I often reflect on these mornings.

They're not flashy or Instagram-worthy.

They won't make headlines or change the world.

But in their quiet constancy, they've become a cornerstone of our relationship, a shared experience that's ours alone.

These Friday mornings teach me about the value of routine and the comfort found in repetition. They remind me that parenting isn't always about grand gestures or milestone moments. More often, it's about showing up, week after week, for these small rituals that shape our days and our bonds.

So yes, we'll do this again next Friday.

And the Friday after that.

We'll keep showing up.

We’ll keep choosing doughnuts.

We’ll keep wiping frosting from smiling faces.

And we’ll keep making memories.

Because in these simple, sweet moments, we're building something far more lasting than a sugar rush. We're crafting memories, strengthening bonds, and finding joy in the beautifully ordinary rhythm of our days.

Not too long ago, I published THIS note, asking for creative ideas and activities to do with kids instead of watching TV.

The response? Overwhelming, at least for me.

Seven comments and nine likes might not break the internet, but it felt awesome to know people resonated with it!

One comment, in particular, stuck with me. It came from Erin, a homeschooling mother of nine. Nine! If anyone understands the art of engaging kids in meaningful ways, it’s her.

Here’s what she said:

I really loved this take on creative ways to engage with your kids, and quite frankly, it wasn’t something I ever considered.

In my journey to limit screen time, I have been solely focused on finding activities to replace screen time, but I had never thought about replacing screen time with the mundane everyday tasks that we have to do.

I have written about how important it is for kids to experience boredom.

See: The Hidden Cost of Screen Time

I never thought much about boredom beyond kids just sitting around with nothing to do. But Erin’s comment made me see it differently. Boredom isn’t just about inactivity. It can come from routine, repetition, and everyday moments like grocery shopping or washing dishes. And that kind of boredom? It’s not a problem to solve; it’s an opportunity. It teaches patience, creativity, and resilience—maybe even more than structured play ever could.

That got me thinking—what if these everyday tasks are doing more for our kids than we realize? So I started digging into the research, and what I found was pretty dang interesting.

It turns out, letting your toddler help with simple, everyday chores isn’t just a way to keep them occupied. It plays a key role in their development and strengthens family bonds. And in a world that constantly pulls us in different directions, creating those small moments of connection matters more than ever.

So what do the experts say about this? Let’s take a look.

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Cognitive Development Through Participation

To tell you the truth, I never really thought twice about the little tasks we do every day. Washing dishes, folding laundry, running errands just felt like part of the routine.

But the more I looked into it, the more I realized these moments aren’t just about getting things done. They’re full of opportunities for kids to learn, grow, and develop important skills in ways that feel completely natural.

Executive Function: The Brain’s Control Center

You know how sometimes your toddler will insist on helping with something, and it takes forever to get anything done? Turns out, those moments are actually helping them build executive function skills, which are super important for things like focus, self-control, and problem-solving.

A study published in Australian Occupational Therapy found that kids who regularly do self-care and family chores show stronger working memory and self-regulation.

Basically, every time they help with dishes or sort laundry, their brain learns how to follow steps, adapt when things change, and stay focused on a task, which are all incredibly important skills they’ll use for the rest of their lives.

Montessori educators have been onto this for years. Their whole philosophy is built around “Practical Life” activities, which teach kids real-world skills in a hands-on way.

Here’s what’s happening when kids help with simple tasks:

• Pouring juice into a cup? They’re learning precision, hand-eye coordination, and cause and effect.

• Helping stir pancake batter? They’re strengthening motor skills and seeing how ingredients combine.

• Matching socks while folding laundry? That’s an early lesson in patterns and categorization.

• Carrying groceries into the house? They’re learning about responsibility and building strength.

• Setting the table? They’re developing sequencing skills—figuring out what goes where and in what order.

All of this builds confidence and independence, too. When kids take part in real tasks they start to see themselves as capable and helpful. They’re not just pretending to do “grown-up” things; they’re actively contributing, and that feeling of responsibility is powerful.

Over time, these small moments add up, reinforcing a sense of competence that carries into other areas of their lives, from problem-solving to trying new challenges with less hesitation.

Why This Shifted My Perspective

I used to think letting my toddler “help” just meant more messes, extra time, and a whole lot of patience on my part. It felt easier to just do things myself and keep the day moving.

But now, knowing that these everyday moments are actually shaping their brain by building focus, problem-solving skills, and independence, it completely changes how I see them.

What once felt like a hassle now feels like an investment. Slowing down, letting them take part, and embracing the small moments isn’t just good for them and it’s good for me too.

Building Responsibility and Independence

When toddlers take on small responsibilities, like putting their toys away or carrying a grocery bag, they’re not just “helping.” They’re learning how to contribute, problem-solve, and take ownership of their actions. Research shows that giving kids household responsibilities early on helps them develop a stronger sense of self-sufficiency and accountability as they grow.

And when you really think about it, it all makes sense.

When kids see that their actions have a real impact, like setting the table so the family can eat or folding laundry so they have clean clothes, they start to understand responsibility in a way no lecture could ever teach. And with each completed task, their confidence grows. They’re not just playing pretend; they’re learning they can do things on their own.

Here’s what’s happening behind the scenes when kids take on small responsibilities:

• They build problem-solving skills. When a toddler figures out how to stack plates without them tipping over or matches socks from the laundry pile, they’re practicing critical thinking.

• They develop patience and persistence. Tasks like wiping a table or sweeping require focus and effort, even when the results aren’t immediate.

• They learn that their contributions matter. Seeing the family eat at a table they helped set or finding their favorite toy in a tidy room reinforces that their efforts have real, positive outcomes.

• They gain a sense of control and confidence. The more they master small tasks, the more they believe in their ability to handle bigger ones.

Fostering Empathy and Teamwork

But it’s not just about their personal growth. When kids pitch in with household tasks, they also learn something even bigger—how to work as a team.

Chores show kids that their contributions matter and that keeping a home running smoothly isn’t just one person’s job. When they help set the table, take care of a younger sibling, or sort groceries, they see firsthand how their efforts make life better for everyone. Studies suggest that involving children in cooperative tasks helps build empathy and social awareness, skills that shape how they interact with others throughout their lives.

Think about it. When a toddler carries a small grocery bag, they aren’t just learning how to balance weight in their arms. They’re seeing what it means to contribute to the family. When they help clean up after dinner, they’re learning that everyone plays a role, not just mom or dad.

Over time, these moments teach them to notice when others need help and to step in without being asked, which is a lesson that will serve them far beyond childhood.

Practical Advice for Parents

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Okay, so we know involving toddlers in everyday tasks is great for their development. But let’s be real, getting a toddler to “help” can feel like it’s just making everything take longer (and sometimes messier). So how do we actually make this work without losing our sanity? Here’s what I found out.

Starting with the Right Tasks

Not all chores are created equal, especially for toddlers. The key is finding small tasks they can actually handle so they feel capable instead of frustrated. I’ve started giving my kids little jobs that match what they’re able to do, and it’s been a game-changer.

Some toddler-friendly chores to start with:

• Picking up toys: Simple and easy, and they love showing off their “clean-up skills.”

• Helping set the table: Let them put napkins or spoons out (bonus: it keeps them busy while you finish cooking).

• Watering plants: A small watering can = big excitement.

• Wiping the table: Give them a damp cloth, and suddenly, they’re a big kid doing important work.

• Matching socks from the laundry: An early lesson in patterns and organization, plus it keeps them occupied.

The trick is making sure the task fits their ability. If it’s too hard, they’ll get frustrated, and if it’s too easy, they’ll lose interest.

Making Chores Feel Fun (Instead of a Battle)

Most kids aren’t naturally excited about cleaning up. But I found that the way we frame chores makes a huge difference. Instead of making it feel like a boring responsibility, I try to make it fun.

Here’s what’s actually helped:

• Turn it into a game: Who can pick up the most toys before the song ends? Instant excitement.

• Use music: A fun playlist makes folding laundry or sweeping way more enjoyable.

• Give choices: “Do you want to set out the forks or the napkins?” Giving them some control helps them feel more invested.

• Celebrate their effort: I don’t go overboard, but a simple “Wow, you worked hard on that!” makes a huge impact.

• Work together: Kids love doing what we do, so if they see us enjoying (or at least not dreading) chores, they’re more likely to get involved.

The Bigger Picture: It’s About More Than Just Clean Floors

At the end of the day, this isn’t just about getting things done faster or having a cleaner house (though that’s a nice bonus). It’s about raising kids who feel capable, responsible, and connected to their family.

The more I lean into this, the more I see that these little moments of setting the table together, picking up blocks, watering plants are more than just chores. They’re lessons in patience, teamwork, and confidence.

And yeah, it might take a little longer now, but I have a feeling it’s going to pay off in the long run.

There was a time for all of us when an old cardboard box was a spaceship. When the couch cushions weren’t just furniture, they were stepping stones over lava. When a stick found on the ground could be a magic wand, a sword, or the key to a secret treasure chest buried in the backyard.

Then, at some point, life got busy. Responsibilities took over. And the kind where you lost track of time, where your imagination ran wild, faded into the background.

But here’s the thing: That part of you, the kid who could turn anything into an adventure, is still in there. And Global Day of Unplugging is the perfect excuse to bring them back.

What Is Global Day of Unplugging?

Imagine hitting pause on screens—just for 24 hours.

No notifications.

No doom-scrolling.

No "just one more episode" before bed.

Just real-world connection, play, and the kind of presence that’s harder to come by in a world where we spend, on average, three months per year looking at screens.

That’s what Global Day of Unplugging is all about.

This year, the movement celebrating its 16th anniversary is growing from small, screen-free gatherings into a worldwide initiative backed by organizations, celebrities, and digital wellness advocates.

The date this year is March 7th at sundown, and is centered around the theme, "Unplug on Purpose," takes things even further by challenging participants not just to turn off their devices, but to use that time to do something meaningful.

For parents, that means one thing: This is your chance to give your kids—and yourself—something better than screen time.

That’s where The Screen-Free Dad comes in.

At The Screen-Free Dad, I often discuss unplugging. Not because screens are the enemy but because stepping away from them opens the door to something better: more connection, more laughter, and more of the moments that actually stick with our kids long after childhood is over.

That’s exactly why this collaboration with Global Day of Unplugging makes so much sense.

Their mission isn’t just about putting down devices for a day—it’s about reclaiming human connection in a world that’s increasingly designed to pull us apart.

And if you’re a parent wondering how to make this day count, here’s the secret:

Stop thinking like an adult and start playing like a kid.

The Challenge: “What Do We Actually Do?”

I get it. Turning off screens sounds great in theory. But when you’ve got kids asking, “Now what?” ten minutes into the day, it’s easy to feel stuck.

We’re so used to managing play that we forget how to actually be in it. That’s why this guide isn’t just a list of things to do. It’s an invitation to step into your kids' world, follow their lead, and play like you did before emails, deadlines, and never-ending to-do lists took over.

it’s time to build forts, tell stories, explore, create, and let go of the idea that everything has to have a purpose beyond fun.

Because here’s the truth:

Play is the purpose.

And when we let ourselves fully engage in it, that’s when the best memories happen.

Warning: This is a long post, but it’s not meant to be read all at once. Feel free to jump around and find what works best for you. Make sure to check out the free downloads at the end!

Ready? Let’s jump in and relearn how to play like a kid and explore how to make Global Day of Unplugging a fun, screen-free experience your family will love.

The Importance of Playing Like a Kid (The Nitty-Gritty)

Parenting today often feels like a balancing act between supervision and distraction. We set up the activities, make sure no one’s about to swallow a crayon, and then check out (mentally or physically) because, well, we’ve got a million things on our plates.

Here’s the truth: Kids don’t just want us nearby—they want us fully present.

They don’t need a supervisor keeping watch. They need a playmate jumping in.

When we shift from watching play to engaging in it, we’re not just making memories. We’re giving our kids (and ourselves) something deeper: stronger connections, better emotional health, and the kind of creativity that gets buried under the weight of adulthood.

And the science backs it up.

Play isn’t just something kids do—it’s something they need.

According to research from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), play is essential for healthy brain development. It shapes the emotional, social, and cognitive skills kids will rely on for life. Play is how they learn, process emotions, and make sense of the world around them.

But play isn’t just for kids.

When parents fully engage, we activate those same areas of our own brains.

Play lowers stress, strengthens emotional resilience, and deepens our connection with our kids. it’s not a break from parenting.

it’s one of the most important parts of it.

The same research also shows that engaged play with a caregiver strengthens emotional bonds, enhances brain development, and improves a child’s ability to handle stress and solve problems.

Playing with your child is so much more than entertaining them. it’s about building a relationship with them in a way that no screen, toy, or structured activity could ever do. And the benefits go far beyond fun—when you actively play with your kids, you’re helping them develop essential emotional, cognitive, and social skills that will last a lifetime.

Here’s why it matters:

1. Emotional Development: Helping Kids Express and Regulate Feelings

Kids use play to process big emotions, whether it’s celebrating a superhero victory or comforting a stuffed animal. When parents actively participate, they help reinforce emotional regulation and resilience, which:

• Encourages emotional expression: Kids act out feelings in a safe, low-pressure way.

• Builds resilience: Play allows children to navigate challenges and setbacks.

• Provides emotional support: Parental involvement helps kids feel seen and validated.

How Parents Can Help:

• Join their world. If your child is acting out a scenario, engage with curiosity—ask, “What’s happening next?”

• Validate their emotions. Use play to help them name their feelings: “Your stuffed animal looks sad. What can we do to help?”

• Model problem-solving. If a game becomes frustrating, guide them through managing their emotions: “Let’s take a deep breath and try again.”

Source: PubMed Central

2. Cognitive Growth: Boosting Problem-Solving and Creativity

Games like “the floor is lava” aren’t just fun, they’re mental workouts that help kids think critically and adapt to new situations, and help kids:

• Develop problem-solving skills: Play teaches kids how to navigate obstacles.

• Enhance creativity: Open-ended play encourages imagination and innovation.

• Strengthen adaptability: Kids learn to adjust their approach when faced with new challenges.

How Parents Can Help:

• Introduce new challenges to keep kids thinking.

• Ask open-ended questions like, “What happens if we try this?”

• Encourage creative problem-solving by letting them experiment with different ideas.

Source: Commonwealth Pediatrics

3. Social Skills: Teaching Cooperation and Conflict Resolution

Play isn’t always smooth, kids disagree on rules, take turns, and work through conflicts. But these moments are valuable lessons in teamwork and communication, which:

• Teaches patience: Kids learn to wait their turn and follow rules.

• Encourages cooperation: Playing together builds teamwork and compromise.

• Develops conflict resolution skills: Play provides practice in problem-solving and negotiation.

How Parents Can Help:

• Model fair play and good sportsmanship.

• Guide kids through conflict resolution by helping them talk things out.

• Praise teamwork and communication rather than just focusing on winning.

Source: AAP Publications

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Make the Most of Global Day of Unplugging

Ok, let’s pause for a second. We’ve talked about the science, the benefits, and why playing with your kids matters, but let’s not lose sight of why we’re here.

We’re talking about Global Day of Unplugging—a full 24 hours without screens. No TV, no tablets, no scrolling. Just real, uninterrupted time with your kids.

So what does that actually look like?

Don’t worry, it doesn’t involve scheduling every minute or stressing over the “perfect” activity. it means being present, saying yes to play, and stepping into their world, whatever that may look like.

But let’s be real, 24 hours is a long time if you’re not used to unplugging. If you’re wondering what do we actually do all day?

Don’t worry, you’re not alone.

That’s exactly why I’ve put together this list.

Here are 10 engaging, screen-free activities to help you make Global Day of Unplugging an unforgettable adventure.

Let’s get started.

1. Build a Fort

A few blankets and chairs can turn into anything. A castle, a rocket ship, or a secret clubhouse with VIP-only access.

Remember: Forts aren’t just cozy, they’re creativity in action.

What to Do: Let your kids take the lead in designing their hideaway. Will it have tunnels? A hidden entrance? A no-grown-ups-allowed rule?

Why it’s Awesome:

• Creativity & Problem-Solving: Figuring out how to keep it standing = hands-on engineering (North Shore Pediatric Therapy).

• Fine Motor Skills: Lifting, folding, and securing materials builds coordination.

• Sense of Ownership: When kids build something themselves, they take pride in it.

Make it Even Better:

• Add fairy lights, pillows, and snacks for next-level coziness.

• Stay inside with them. Read, tell stories, or just enjoy the moment together.

2. Get Crafty

Give a kid some markers, glue, and a pile of paper, and suddenly they’re an inventor, an artist, or a mad scientist creating their next masterpiece.

Remember: Crafting isn’t about perfection, it’s about turning imagination into something real.

What to Do: Set up a creative space with whatever materials you have, crayons, cardboard, stickers, old magazines. Let kids take the lead, whether they have a specific project in mind or just want to experiment.

Why it’s Awesome:

• Self-Expression: Art helps kids process emotions and tell stories in a visual way.

• Fine Motor Skills: Cutting, gluing, and drawing improve dexterity and hand-eye coordination. (Scholastic)

• Cognitive Flexibility: Open-ended crafting teaches kids to experiment, adapt, and solve problems creatively. Research shows that hands-on art activities help build emotional resilience and critical thinking skills.

Make it Even Better:

• Ask about their creation: “Tell me about it!” instead of “What is it?”

• Avoid correcting or “fixing” their work because art is about exploration, not precision.

• Display their work proudly on the fridge, in a frame, or as part of a homemade “gallery.”

3. Dive into a Board Game

There’s something timeless about gathering around a board game. Maybe it’s the nostalgia of rolling dice or the thrill of a well-planned strategy.

Remember: The shared moments of laughter and friendly competition that make it great.

What to Do: Pick a game that suits your child’s age. Candy Land for younger kids, Uno for quick fun, Catan for a deeper challenge. The goal isn’t just to play, it’s to create an experience you’ll all remember.

Why it’s Awesome:

• Strategic Thinking: Games encourage planning, problem-solving, and decision-making (Child Development Clinic).

• Social Skills: Turn-taking, rule-following, and handling wins (and losses) build patience and respect.

• Focus & Attention Span: Unlike digital games, board games require deep thinking and sustained engagement. Studies show that playing them helps children develop emotional regulation and cooperative skills.

Make it Even Better:

• Let them tweak the rules. Sometimes House Rules make the best memories.

• Model good sportsmanship. Winning isn’t everything (and neither is holding a grudge over Monopoly).

• If the mood shifts from fun to frustration, pivot. The goal is to connect, not compete.

4. Create an Imaginary World

One minute, you’re a parent standing in the living room. The next, your child hands you a wooden spoon and declares, “You’re the royal chef, and the king wants rainbow spaghetti!”

Remember: You don’t have to do anything crazy with this. Just follow your kids' lead; they are the experts here.

What to Do: Let your child pick the scenario, pirates hunting treasure, superheroes saving the day, or chefs running the world’s wackiest restaurant. Use costumes, props, or just your best dramatic voice to bring the story to life.

Why it’s Awesome:

• Language Development: Storytelling boosts vocabulary and communication skills.

• Emotional Exploration: Pretend play helps kids process big emotions in a safe way—whether they’re a brave knight or a mischievous villain (Therapy Focus).

• Problem-Solving & Creativity: Making up stories teaches flexibility and creative thinking, skills that translate into real-life challenges.

Make it Even Better:

• Say yes to their ideas: if they say you’re a talking dog, commit to the role.

• Introduce a plot twist: what if the superhero loses their powers?

• Use everyday objects: a mop is a wizard’s staff, a laundry basket is a spaceship.

5. Cook Together

Cooking with kids is messy, unpredictable, and sometimes results in pancakes that resemble abstract art.

Remember: Food made together, tastes so much better.

What to Do: Choose a simple recipe, such as pancakes, homemade pizza, or fruit smoothies, and assign tasks based on the children's age (measuring, stirring, and taste testing are very important).

Why it’s Awesome:

• Math & Science Skills: Measuring = fractions, mixing = chemistry, baking = patience. Research shows that cooking helps kids develop problem-solving skills and boosts early math comprehension (HealthyChildren.org).

• Responsibility: Following a recipe teaches patience, sequencing, and independence.

• Sensory Learning: Cooking engages all five senses, making it a powerful learning experience.

Make it Even Better:

• Let go of perfection: if the cookies are lumpy or an eggshell sneaks in, who cares?

• Narrate the process: ask “Why do you think the pancake bubbles?”

• Make it a tradition: Friday DIY pizza night? Sunday pancake morning? Kids love rituals.

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6. Go on an Adventure Walk

A walk is just a walk, until you turn it into an adventure.

Remember: Going on a walk is one of the easiest ways to unplug. Step outside. But instead of a routine stroll, turn it into a quest, a scavenger hunt, a nature expedition, or a secret mission.

What to Do:

• Scavenger Hunt: Find a red leaf, a heart-shaped rock, or something that makes noise.

• Explorer Mode: Pretend you’re discovering a new land—what should you name it?

• Sensory Walk: Stop to listen for birds, feel tree bark, or notice how the air smells.

Why it’s Awesome:

• Physical Activity: Running, climbing, and exploring build coordination and endurance (Wild About Here).

• Curiosity & Observation: Kids learn to notice small details in their surroundings. Studies show that time in nature enhances cognitive function and emotional well-being.

• Mindfulness: Slowing down and paying attention teaches kids to appreciate the present moment.

Make it Even Better:

• Ask open-ended questions: "What do you think that squirrel is doing?"

• Make up a story: “This tree is actually a secret portal to…”

• Bring a journal: sketching or writing about discoveries makes it even more memorable.

7. Read Aloud and Act it Out

A book is just a book, until you bring it to life. Maybe the main character suddenly has a silly accent. Maybe the quiet bedtime story turns into a full-on stage production with costumes and props.

Remember: When reading becomes interactive, kids don’t just listen, they experience the story.

What to Do: Pick a favorite book (or a new one) and turn it into an event:

• Take Turns Reading: Let them “be” one of the characters while you narrate.

• Use Different Voices: A grumpy bear, a tiny mouse, a dramatic villain—go big!

• Act it Out: Move around, make sound effects, even grab props to bring the story to life.

Why it’s Awesome:

• Literacy & Language Development: Reading out loud expands vocabulary and improves comprehension. Studies show that kids who engage in interactive reading have stronger literacy outcomes (Canton Public Library).

• Imagination: Acting out stories helps kids visualize narratives, turning books into real adventures.

• Confidence: Performing—even just at home—builds self-expression and public speaking skills.

Make it Even Better:

• Let Them Change the Story. What if the Big Bad Wolf was actually friendly?

• Turn it Into a Puppet Show. Use stuffed animals or make simple sock puppets.

• Make it a Habit. Pick a weekly “story theater” night where the whole family joins in.

8. Engage in a Simple Science Experiment

To a kid, science is magic with better explanations, and sometimes, even better messes.

Remember: There’s nothing quite like the thrill of What happens if we try this?

What to Do: Pick a simple experiment and let curiosity take the lead:

• Baking Soda & Vinegar Volcano: A classic explosion of bubbly fun.

• Floating & Sinking Objects: Test different objects in a bowl of water to discover why some float while others sink?

Why it’s Awesome:

• Critical Thinking: Kids learn to form hypotheses, observe results, and adjust their thinking, which are key problem-solving skills.

• STEM Learning: Hands-on science turns abstract concepts into real experiences. Research shows that experiential learning builds a deeper understanding of scientific principles. (Commonwealth Pediatrics)

• Patience & Focus: Some experiments take time, teaching delayed gratification and observation skills.

Make it Even Better:

• Encourage Wild Guesses. “What do you think will happen if we add more vinegar?” No answer is wrong. It’s all just part of the fun.

• Let Kids Lead. Even if they think they know the answer, let them test it for themselves.

• Celebrate the Process, Not Just the Outcome. Even if the experiment fails, it’s still a discovery. (And sometimes, the biggest messes make the best memories.)

9. Host a Family Talent Show

Somewhere in your house, your kid has a hidden talent just waiting for the perfect audience. Maybe they’ve been secretly practicing their best knock-knock jokes, or maybe they’ve got an interpretive dance routine inspired by their favorite superhero.

Remember: The goal is participation not perfection

What to Do: Set up a “stage” (aka, the living room) and let each family member prepare a short act. Anything goes:

• Singing, dancing, playing an instrument

• Magic tricks, joke-telling, or poetry readings

• Lip-sync battles, juggling, or even shadow puppets

Why it’s Awesome:

• Confidence-Building: Performing in front of family boosts self-esteem in a safe and supportive space (Action For Healthy Kids).

• Self-Expression: Gives kids a chance to showcase their unique interests and skills, even the totally weird ones.

• Social Connection: Laughter, applause, and encouragement make this a bonding experience for the whole family. Studies show that shared play and creative expression strengthen parent-child relationships.

Make it Even Better:

• Go All In. Wear costumes, set up a “judges’ panel,” or make DIY “tickets” for the event.

• Perform Together. If your child is nervous, join them in a parent-child duet (even if it’s off-key). This will create instant core memories.

• Celebrate Every Act. Whether it’s a flawless magic trick or a two-second somersault, cheer just as loudly.

10. Write and Illustrate a Story Together

Every kid has a story inside them. Sometimes it’s about a superhero squirrel, sometimes it’s about a time-traveling taco, and sometimes… well, sometimes it makes absolutely no sense, but that’s what makes it brilliant.

Remember: Writing and illustrating a story together isn’t just about creating a book, it’s about creating a world, together. And when kids see their ideas come to life on paper, it’s pure magic.

What to Do:

• Start with a sentence. Something simple like “Once upon a time, a penguin found a mysterious map...” and let each person take turns adding to it.

• Illustrate it! Draw pictures, cut out magazine clippings, or even turn it into a comic strip.

• Make it a “real” book. Staple the pages together, make a cover, and give it an official title (something like “The Epic Adventures of Captain Pancake”).

Why it’s Awesome:

• Creativity & Imagination: Storytelling is how kids process the world and explore their ideas (Yoremi Kids).

• Teamwork: Creating something together teaches kids to collaborate and problem-solve, ask questions like, "Wait, does Captain Pancake need a sidekick?"

• Cognitive Development: Writing and illustrating strengthen language skills, narrative thinking, and fine motor coordination, all of which are essential for early literacy. Studies also show that storytelling activities help children develop sequencing skills and expand their vocabulary.

Make it Even Better:

• Encourage Them to Take the Lead. If your kid wants to turn the story into a mystery, a comedy, or a full-on epic saga, let them.

• Act it Out. Once the book is finished, put on a family play version of the story.

• Make it a Tradition. Start a family storybook collection and write a new one every month.

Making Screen-Free Play a Habit Beyond Global Day of Unplugging

Unplugging for 24 hours is a challenge, but what if it became a habit?

The truth is, one screen-free day can be refreshing, but regularly unplugging can be transformative. Kids don’t just need one day of undivided attention. They need consistent moments when screens don’t compete for time, play isn’t rushed, and connection comes first.

So, instead of letting the magic of Global Day of Unplugging end when the clock strikes midnight, use it as a launchpad for more screen-free time all year long.

Ideas for Keeping the Momentum Going:

Make it a Weekly Tradition

• Establish a “Screen-Free Saturday” or “Tech-Free Tuesday” as a set time each week where everyone unplugs, no excuses.

• Keep it simple: no need for elaborate plans. The key is consistency.

Create a “Boredom Box”

• Write down fun activity ideas (build a fort, go on a nature walk, invent a new board game) and let kids pick one at random when boredom strikes.

• Let them contribute ideas, too—kids are far more likely to engage when they feel ownership.

• Check out our free Boredom Box guide at the end of the post.

Prioritize Daily Playtime (Even If it’s Just 10 Minutes)

• Unplugging doesn’t have to be an all-day event. Even 10-15 minutes of fully present, screen-free time each day strengthens bonds and builds lasting memories.

• it can be as simple as telling a bedtime story, playing a quick round of tag, or doodling together after dinner.

Reflect on the Experience

• Ask kids, “What was your favorite part of unplugging?”

• Encourage them to choose one activity they want to keep doing regularly—and make it a priority.

Remember, the goal isn’t to eliminate screens; it’s to create balance. We want to show kids that fun, connection, and creativity don’t need a Wi-Fi signal.

The more often they see this, the more they’ll seek it out on their own.

Because at the end of the day, the best moments of childhood aren’t the ones spent staring at a screen. They’re the ones spent together.

Play, Connect, Repeat

Congrats on making it to the end of this (admittedly long) post! If you’re still here, you’re serious about creating more screen-free moments with your kids, and that’s worth celebrating. Thanks for joining me on this journey to reclaim real connection, real play, and real memories.

Remember, unplugging isn’t about limiting technology, it’s about reclaiming what matters most. It’s about belly laughs, late-night fort-building, and impromptu dance parties in the living room. It’s about being present—not just physically but fully engaged in the moments that turn into lifelong memories.

That’s why The Screen-Free Dad and Global Day of Unplugging share the same mission: to help parents trade screen time for real-time, digital noise and deeper connection.

Now, it’s your turn.

• Power down: Put the screens away and clear space for what truly matters.

• Lean in: Play, explore, and let go of the need to “do it right.”

• Reconnect: Rediscover the magic of childhood—together.

Need a little help getting started? Download a free Boredom Box guide filled with ready-to-use activity prompts, plus a printable summary of all the screen-free activities in this post to use as a quick reference:

How To Build A Boredom Box

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10 Screen Free Activities Reference

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And when you do? Share it.

Use #GlobalDayOfUnplugging to inspire others to join the movement.

Because the more we unplug, the more we show our kids what real connection looks like.

Some mornings, parenting feels like a heartwarming scene from a Pixar movie. Other mornings, it feels like an episode of Survivor where you thought you knew where the vote was going to go, but then suddenly, you get blindsided, and Jeff snuffs your torch.

This was one of those mornings.

We were on our way to preschool. I was driving and thinking about the million things I had to do that day when, from the back seat, my daughter hit me with an unexpected reality check.

"Dad," she said thoughtfully, "you're not very good at skateboarding."

No context. No warning. Just a raw, unsolicited performance review.

Now, she wasn’t wrong. I’ve been learning how to skateboard for the past couple of years and being in my 30s, It’s been slow progress. I’ve had a lot of falls, a few scraped elbows, and one nearly career-ending rib injury. But despite all that, I really feel like I’ve been getting better.

Apparently, though, my toughest critic disagreed.

I laughed because what else could I do? She wasn’t trying to be mean. She was just stating a fact, plain and simple. Toddlers don’t soften their words or consider how they’ll land. They just say what’s on their minds.

As I kept driving, I found myself thinking about that kind of unfiltered honesty. How natural it is for kids, how rare it becomes for adults, and what role we play in shaping it.

Do we teach them to soften the truth, or do we help them learn how to use honesty in a way that builds trust instead of tearing it down? I wanted to know, so I dug into the research.

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The Psychology of Toddler Honesty

Why Do Toddlers Speak Their Minds?

What I learned is toddlers don’t just prefer honesty—they default to it. Their brains aren’t wired for tact or subtlety yet. Instead, they process the world in literal terms, which is why they say exactly what they see and think.

At this stage of development, their understanding of truth is simple: things are either true or false. There’s no room for social cushioning or strategic phrasing. This blunt truth-telling isn’t just about lacking a filter; it’s about how they process reality.

Neurologically, the prefrontal cortex—the part of the brain responsible for impulse control, social awareness, and emotional regulation—is still in early development.

Because of this, toddlers:

• Don't have a real concept of social norms yet, and they don’t understand that certain truths might be better left unspoken.

• Haven’t developed the ability to anticipate emotional reactions. They aren’t trying to hurt feelings. They just haven’t learned how words can impact others.

• Process language literally. If something is true to them, they assume it’s universally true and say it out loud without hesitation.

These neurological factors make toddler honesty both refreshing and, occasionally, mortifying.

What Makes Honesty a Learned Behavior?

Something else I found incredibly fascinating is that honesty isn’t necessarily something kids have to be taught, but dishonesty is.

Research suggests that deception is not an inborn trait but something that children begin to experiment with as they age and observe social interactions. And they’ve found that:

• Young children (ages 3-4) will almost always tell the truth, even when there’s no reward for doing so. They don’t yet recognize the concept of dishonesty as a tool for self-preservation or social benefit.

• By age 5-6, children begin to experiment with small deceptions, often to avoid punishment, gain approval, or test boundaries.

• By age 7-8, kids start to recognize "polite lies" in situations where dishonesty can maintain social harmony, like pretending to like a gift.

This timeline suggests that honesty, at its core, is a default setting that slowly becomes more complex as kids observe the social world around them.

All of this was super interesting but also super nerve-racking. It got me thinking: How do I make sure I don’t teach my kid to be dishonest?

How to Foster an Honest Household

Creating a home where honesty thrives isn’t about demanding truthfulness or punishing dishonesty. It’s about making honesty feel safe, valued, and expected. Kids are more likely to be truthful when they see honesty as a natural part of daily life rather than something they only resort to when they aren’t afraid of consequences.

This starts with the way we respond to their honesty, the examples we set, and the expectations we reinforce.

1. Setting the Standard for Honesty

For kids to embrace honesty, they need to see it modeled consistently in daily life.

This means:

• Demonstrating truthfulness in everyday conversations. Let kids hear you be honest in moments that matter. If you make a mistake, own it: “I forgot to pick up milk at the store. I’ll grab it tomorrow.”

• Reinforcing honesty through actions. If you expect your child to be truthful but they catch you telling small fibs, they’ll take note. Be the example.

• Discussing honesty beyond rule-following. Instead of making it about avoiding punishment, talk about why honesty is important and how it builds trust.

I’ve written before about mindset shifts that help when limiting screen time, and many of those same shifts can also apply to building an honest household. Sometimes, it’s less about enforcing rules and more about creating an environment where the right choices come naturally.

2. Encouraging Truth-Telling Without Fear

If kids associate honesty with getting in trouble, they’ll quickly learn that hiding the truth feels safer. Instead of making truth-telling a high-risk action, reframe it as a brave one.

• Separate the action from the honesty. If your child admits to breaking something, acknowledge their truthfulness first: “I really appreciate you telling me. Let’s figure out how to fix it.”

• Avoid immediate punishments for honest mistakes. If a child knows they’ll be reprimanded the moment they admit to something, they’ll hesitate next time.

• Use honesty as a learning tool, not a weapon. Instead of, “Why didn’t you just tell me the truth?” try, “What can we do differently next time?”

When kids feel safe being honest, they’re more likely to come to you with bigger truths later in life.

3. Teaching Honesty with Emotional Awareness

Honesty should never feel like an obligation. It should feel like a responsibility kids take pride in.

Teaching emotional intelligence alongside honesty helps kids develop a sense of when, how, and why to tell the truth thoughtfully.

• Help kids reframe their honesty. If they blurt out something harsh, guide them in reshaping their words. Instead of “That dinner was bad,” they could say, “I liked last night’s dinner more.”

• Introduce the idea of helpful vs. unnecessary truth-telling. Some truths serve a purpose, while others don’t need to be shared. Asking, “Does this need to be said?” helps kids learn discretion.

• Show them how honesty builds connection. Share examples of times when being truthful strengthened a friendship or relationship. Help them see honesty as a powerful tool for trust, not just a rule to follow.

Closing Thoughts: Embracing the Honest Moments

That morning in the car, my daughter wasn’t trying to critique my skateboarding skills. She was just speaking her truth.

Her words weren’t filtered, softened, or carefully phrased. They were real.

As much as my pride took a small hit, I realized that this stage of honesty is fleeting. In a few years, she’ll learn to hold back certain truths, begin filtering what she says, and start learning when honesty is appropriate and how to navigate social expectations.

But right now? She’s fearless in her honesty. And that’s something to celebrate.

As parents, our job isn’t to suppress that honesty. It’s to shape it.

We need to help our kids navigate the world with truth and kindness and create a home where they feel safe speaking openly. We need to show them every day that honesty isn’t just about avoiding trouble. It’s about being the kind of person people can trust.

So, to all the dads out there who get unsolicited feedback on their skills, whether it’s skateboarding, singing, or making pancakes, take it as a badge of honor. Your kid is honest with you because they trust you. And in the long run, that trust is worth more than any smooth kickflip.

And mark my words: As soon as I land that kickflip, I’ll be sure to report back to you all on how my daughter reacts.

Earlier today, while cleaning the living room, I got down on my hands and knees to fish out the usual lost toys from under the couch.

But instead of just a stray block or stuffed animal, my hand landed on something unexpected—a forgotten bottle of milk wedged behind a pile of toys. I have no idea how long it had been down there, but judging by the level of chunk, it had been a while.

I took it to the sink to wash it out. Thankfully, I don’t have a sense of smell, so things like this don’t bother me much. But as I stood there, rinsing away what had once been fresh and whole, I saw something I didn’t expect.

I saw myself.

And I know what you’re thinking. And yeah, I get it. I’m reading too much into it. But the more I thought about it, the more it made sense.

That bottle started out full—poured with care, meant to nourish, to sustain. It had a purpose. But over time, it was forgotten, left in the chaos, hidden beneath the daily mess of life. And in being forgotten, it changed. It thickened, curdled, and became something else entirely.

Fatherhood does that to you.

You start fresh, filled with energy, ready to give everything you have. Day after day, you pour yourself out, meeting everyone’s needs before your own. And in the process, you change. You thicken under the weight of responsibility, strain under exhaustion, and feel different from the person you were before.

But here’s what hit me as I stood at the sink, washing that old bottle:

Change isn’t a bad thing. That bottle wasn’t ruined—just transformed. And maybe, just maybe, the same is true for fathers.

So, I wrote a poem about it.

To the Bottle of Old Chunky Milk Lost Under the Couch: An Ode to Fatherhood

Oh bottle forgotten, forsaken, unseen,
you whisper the trials where fathers have been.
Once fresh, once whole, now curdled and gray,
you mirror the cost, yet the gift, of each day.

You bore the sweet burden of hunger and need,
poured freely in service, in duty, in creed.
Your purpose was simple yet weighty and grand—
to nourish, to strengthen, by tireless hand.

And now, in the shadow beneath battered toys,
you rest like the bones of long-vanished joys.
Yet even in ruin, your tale still is told—
for love, once given, does not grow old.

So, too, does the father, bent but not broken,
his patience like rivers, his promises spoken.
His hands lined with labor, his back stooped with care,
his love like the milk that once flowed without spare.

For what is a father but time left to thicken,
to sour, to strain, yet never to sicken?
What is his love but a thing left to age,
turning not bitter but deep, strong, and sage?

O milk of my labor, O bottle laid low,
you teach me the truth that all fathers must know:
though time may transform what was bright into dust,
there is beauty in breaking, in service, in trust.

For love does not spoil, though weary it seems—
it curdles to wisdom. It ripens to dreams.
And though I may stumble, grow tired, and fade,
my love, like old milk, will not be unmade.

Fatherhood changes you.

It stretches you.

It empties you.

And, at times, it leaves you feeling like something unrecognizable from who you once were.

But that change isn’t decay—it’s transformation.

The weight you carry, the exhaustion you feel, the slow thickening of your patience, your resilience, your love. It’s proof that you’ve poured yourself into something greater than yourself.

And in the end, that’s not a loss.

That’s the beauty of fatherhood.

Disclaimer: This is a long one, but I promise it’s worth the read! But if you need to, feel free to jump around using the table of contents on the left side of the screen.

I had every intention of getting this blog post out last week. That was the plan. But, like most plans when you have little kids, it didn’t go quite the way I expected.

Last Sunday evening, I was lying on the ground, playing with my 1-year-old, soaking in the calm before the usual toddler chaos kicked in. And then, right on cue, my 3-year-old decided to make things interesting. With all the confidence in the world, she launched herself off the couch like a tiny stunt double and landed directly on my head.

The pain was immediate—sharp and jarring, the kind that makes you pause for a second, wondering if your brain just rebooted. But as a dad, I’ve taken my fair share of surprise hits from flailing limbs and flying toys, so I did what I always do—I shook it off and kept going.

Except… I couldn’t really shake it off. The headache lingered. The brain fog rolled in. And by the end of the day, I knew something was off.

A quick trip to the doctor confirmed it: a mild concussion.

Nothing serious, but serious enough that I had to hit pause on everything I had planned for the week.

The doctor’s orders were clear: get lots of rest, refrain from anything overstimulating, and absolutely no pushing through like I normally would.

That meant I had to slow down, reorganize my priorities, and accept that the week I had planned was no longer going to happen as I wanted it to.

And that sucked.

Like most dads, my to-do list never seems to end. There’s always something to take care of or something that needs my attention and the idea of taking it easy while everything else kept moving forward without me? That felt impossible.

But this time, I didn’t have a choice. If I wanted to heal, I had to shift my mindset. Instead of stressing over what I couldn’t do, I had to focus on what I actually could do.

At first, it was frustrating. I wasn’t getting the things done that I wanted to, and I felt like I was just waiting for the week to pass. But once I stopped stressing over what wasn’t getting done, I realized I actually had a rare chance to slow down and reset.

It wasn’t what I had planned, but it didn’t have to be a bad thing either.

As dads, we like to have a plan. We set rules, establish routines, and try to keep things running smoothly. But parenting rarely goes exactly as expected. When things don’t go the way we envisioned, it’s easy to feel like we’re falling short. This is especially true when it comes to screen time.

Often when we try to cut back on screen time for our kids, we go into it with an all-or-nothing mentality. We tell ourselves:

🚫 No more screens!
🚫 We have to fix this immediately!
🚫 If I let them watch anything, I’m failing as a parent!

And just like my unrealistic plan for the week, this approach is doomed to fail. It’s rigid. It’s unsustainable. And worst of all, it makes limiting screen time feel like a battle—a punishment rather than an opportunity.

But what if we flipped our mindset?

What if, instead of focusing on what we’re taking away, we focused on what we’re adding?

• More time to connect with our kids

• More opportunities for creativity and play

• More presence, more engagement, more real-life experiences

When I had to shift my mindset during my concussion, I stopped focusing on what I was losing and started focusing on what I was gaining: rest, clarity, and a better way to approach my week.

That’s the same shift that makes screen time management successful.

Instead of thinking of it as a limitation, what if we saw it as an opportunity?

That’s exactly the shift we need when it comes to screen time. Instead of treating it like a constant battle, what if we focused on changing the way we think about it? A simple mindset shift can make all the difference in how we approach screen time and how our kids respond to it.

The Power of Mindset: Understanding the Psychology Behind Mindset Shifts

When it comes to parenting—especially something as emotionally charged as screen time—it’s easy to focus on tactics. We search for the right rules, schedules, or restrictions that will magically make everything fall into place. But before any of those strategies can work, something deeper has to change: our mindset.

The way we think about screen time shapes the way we act with it. And if our thinking is rigid, negative, or based on fear, we’re setting ourselves up for frustration. But when we shift our mindset and approach screen time with curiosity, flexibility, and intention, it suddenly becomes easier to manage.

Why Your Mindset Matters in Managing Screen Time

A mindset is a set of beliefs that shape how we interpret and respond to the world (Verywell Mind). It influences our decisions, determines whether we see challenges as roadblocks or opportunities, and can either empower or limit us.

When it comes to screen time, our mindset plays a huge role in how we approach it. If we see it as an uncontrollable problem, we’re more likely to feel frustrated and stuck. But if we treat it as something we can gradually improve, we open the door to practical, realistic solutions that actually work.

Fixed vs. Growth Mindset

Carol Dweck’s research on fixed vs. growth mindsets explains how we approach challenges (Mindset: The New Psychology of Success):

• Fixed Mindset: Believes situations are unchangeable. Avoids challenges, gives up easily. (Example: “I just don’t have time to reduce screen time.”)

• Growth Mindset: Sees challenges as opportunities to improve. Keeps experimenting until they find what works. (Example: “I can try different ways to cut back on screen time.”)

If screen time feels overwhelming, ask yourself:
✔ What if I treated this as a learning process instead of a battle?
✔ What small step could I take today to create more screen-free time?
✔ How can I focus on progress rather than perfection?

How Mindset Affects Parenting and Screen Time

Research shows that parental approach matters just as much as the rules we set:

• Kids with authoritative parents—those who set clear but flexible boundaries—are less likely to overuse screens (Children and Youth Services Review).

• When parents watch and discuss media with their kids, children learn to make better screen-time choices on their own (Journal of Family Communication).

• Hard rules and all-or-nothing approaches don’t work in the long run—kids are more likely to resist strict bans than flexible, balanced guidelines.

At the end of the day, screen time management isn’t just about setting limits—it’s about shaping how our kids think about technology. When they see screen-free time as fun, valuable, and rewarding, they won’t just follow the rules—they’ll develop habits that stick for life.

Five Screen-Time Mindset Shifts for Dads

So now what? We know that managing screen time isn’t just about setting rules—it’s about how we approach it. We also know that shifting our mindset makes the process easier and more sustainable. But what does that actually look like in everyday parenting?

It starts with rethinking the way we see screen time, shifting our focus from frustration and restriction to something more practical and achievable. Instead of getting stuck in the same cycle of guilt, resistance, and all-or-nothing thinking, we can take a different approach—one that actually works.

These five mindset shifts will help make screen time feel less like a constant battle and more like something you can manage with confidence:

• From Limitation to Opportunity – Instead of seeing screen time limits as taking something away, view them as a chance to introduce new activities and strengthen real-world connections.

• From All or Nothing to Small Wins – Instead of trying to eliminate screens overnight, focus on reducing screen time little by little and celebrating progress.

• From "I’m Too Busy" to "Let’s Be Creative" – Instead of feeling like screens are the only way to keep your kids occupied, find ways to incorporate screen-free moments into your busy day.

• From Guilt to Curiosity – Instead of beating yourself up over past screen time habits, approach it with curiosity and problem-solving to figure out what works for your family.

• From "I’m Alone" to "We’re in it Together," – Instead of feeling like you’re the only one struggling, recognize that this is a shared challenge for many parents, and there are ways to get support.

Each of these mindset shifts will not only make screen time limits easier to enforce but will also make them more realistic and sustainable in the long run. Let’s start with the first one.

Mindset Shift #1: From Limitation to Opportunity

It’s easy to think of limiting screen time as taking something away—a restriction, a sacrifice, a battle waiting to happen. And sure, if your kids are used to a lot of screen time, they might push back at first. But when we frame screen time reduction as a loss, it becomes exhausting for everyone.

Why It’s Unproductive:

• If screen time is framed as something they’re being “denied,” kids will naturally resist.

• It makes screen-free time feel like a punishment rather than a positive experience.

• It puts all the pressure on you to come up with alternatives, making it feel like more work.

Instead of thinking of screen-free time as a limitation, think of it as an opening—a chance for your kids to play, imagine, and engage with the world around them.

Every minute not spent on a screen is a minute where they can build new skills, strengthen relationships, and develop creativity. (See my last newsletter)

Implementation Strategies:

• Make screen-free activities just as appealing as screens.

  • If your kid loves video games, find a real-world equivalent like a board game or a scavenger hunt.

  • If they love watching YouTube craft videos, set them up with actual craft supplies and let them create.

• Reframe screen-free time as something exciting.

  • Instead of saying, “We’re turning the TV off now,” try:

    • “Let’s build a fort and see how big we can make it!”

    • “I have a challenge for you—let’s see who can come up with the best new game.”

    • “I need your help making an obstacle course in the backyard!”

  • When kids feel like they’re gaining something fun instead of losing screen time, they’re far more likely to go along with it.

• Use screen-free time as a reward, not a punishment.

  • Instead of using screens as the prize (“If you behave, you can watch TV”), flip it:

    • “After dinner, we get to go outside and play!”

    • “This weekend, we’re having a family game night with popcorn.”

  • Make non-screen activities the thing they look forward to, and screens just one small part of their day.

Shifting from limitation to opportunity changes the way screen-free time feels—not just for your kids but for you too. When you start seeing all the things they get to do instead of screens, screen time limits stop feeling like a struggle and start feeling like a gift.

Mindset Shift #2: From All or Nothing to Small Wins

When you realize your kids are spending too much time in front of screens, it’s tempting to go all in—set hard limits, cut out screens entirely, and try to reset everything overnight. It feels like the fastest way to fix the problem. But the truth is, going from all to nothing almost never works.

Why It’s Unproductive:

• It’s unrealistic. We live in a digital world, and screens are a part of daily life. A cold-turkey approach often leads to frustration for both you and your kids.

• It creates power struggles. If screen time suddenly disappears, kids are more likely to resist and crave it even more.

• It sets you up for burnout. Maintaining a no-screen policy is exhausting, and when it inevitably gets broken, it can feel like you’ve failed.

Instead of thinking in extremes, shift your focus to progress over perfection. The goal isn’t to eliminate screens entirely—it’s to create healthier habits one step at a time. A little less screen time today means more opportunities for play, creativity, and real-world connection.

Implementation Strategies:

• Start small and build from there.

  • Instead of banning screens overnight, start by reducing screen time by just 15 minutes per day.

  • Cut back on passive screen use first (like background TV) before tackling more ingrained habits.

• Celebrate progress, not perfection.

  • If you cut back screen time by 20% this week, that’s a success!

  • Don’t focus on the occasional setbacks—focus on the overall trend of less screen time and more engagement in other activities.

• Make small changes feel big with a visual tracker.

  • Create a simple screen-time chart where kids can track their progress.

  • Let them put a sticker on a calendar or move a token into a jar every time they choose a screen-free activity.

• Stack small wins into bigger habits.

  • If you successfully reduce screen time by 15 minutes a day, try stretching it to 30 minutes the following week.

  • Use that extra time for family games, outdoor play, or hands-on activities that your kids enjoy.

When you focus on small, sustainable changes, screen time limits stop feeling overwhelming and start feeling achievable. Over time, those small wins add up to lasting habits that actually stick.

Mindset Shift #3: From "I’m Too Busy" to "Let’s Be Creative"

When you’re juggling work, house chores, and everything else life throws at you, screens can feel like the only realistic way to keep your kids occupied. The idea of constantly finding screen-free alternatives might seem exhausting or even impossible.

Why It’s Unproductive:

• It assumes screens are the only way to keep kids busy. Kids are naturally creative, but if screens are always the default, they don’t get the chance to develop independent play skills.

• It adds unnecessary pressure. You don’t need to personally entertain your kids every time they’re off screens. You just need to set up an environment where they can engage on their own.

• It makes screen-free time feel like extra work. If limiting screens feels like another item on your never-ending to-do list, it’s going to feel frustrating instead of doable.

Instead of seeing screen-free time as something that requires more of your attention, look for simple ways to make screen-free moments happen naturally. Kids don’t always need constant supervision or structured activities. Sometimes they just need the right setup to engage their own creativity.

Implementation Strategies:

• Encourage independent play with a “Boredom Box.”

  • Fill a box with open-ended toys, puzzles, art supplies, or building materials.

  • When your child says, “I’m bored!” instead of handing them a screen, direct them to the box and let them take charge of their own fun.

  • Rotate the items every few weeks to keep them fresh.

• Turn everyday tasks into interactive experiences.

  • Kids don’t always need a separate “activity” to stay engaged. Sometimes just involving them in what you’re already doing is enough.

  • Let them “help” with cooking, sorting laundry, or watering plants—small tasks that give them a sense of ownership and responsibility.

  • Make it fun: “Can you be in charge of stirring?” “Let’s race to see who can fold the most socks!”

• Create easy, screen-free “busy moments.”

  • If you need time to focus, have simple activities on standby that don’t require your full attention:

    • Audiobooks or podcasts for kids

    • Simple puzzles or coloring pages

    • Sensory play with playdough or kinetic sand

  • These activities give kids a way to stay engaged without needing a screen without your constant guidance.

• Use screen-free time as a reset, not a chore.

  • Instead of saying, “No screens right now,” try reframing it as:

    • “This is our creative time—let’s see what we can make.”

    • “You get to pick a fun activity from the Boredom Box!”

  • When screen-free time feels like an opportunity instead of a restriction, kids are less likely to resist it.

Shifting from “I have to entertain them” to “I can set them up for independent play” makes managing screen time less stressful for you and more engaging for your kids. You’re not adding extra work—you’re simply making small tweaks that turn everyday moments into opportunities for creativity.

Mindset Shift #4: From Guilt to Curiosity

We’ve all been there. You look at the clock and realize your child has been in front of a screen for way longer than you intended. Maybe it was a hectic day, maybe you needed to get some work done, or maybe you just didn’t have the energy to fight it. Whatever the reason, the guilt creeps in. I should be doing better. I should have set better limits. I’m failing at this.

Why It’s Unproductive:

• Guilt leads to shame, which often leads to inaction. Instead of making meaningful changes, we get stuck feeling bad and avoid addressing the issue altogether.

• It makes screen time feel like a moral failing rather than a habit that can be adjusted. Screen use isn’t inherently bad, and it doesn’t make you a bad parent. It’s just something to manage, like sleep schedules or mealtime habits.

• It keeps you focused on the past rather than moving forward. Beating yourself up won’t change what’s already happened, but learning from it can help you improve.

Rather than seeing screen time as something to feel bad about, start seeing it as something to learn from. If you take a step back and observe how, when, and why screens are being used, you’ll have the insight you need to make meaningful changes—without the guilt trip.

Implementation Strategies:

• Track screen use for one week—without judgment.

  • Instead of guessing how much screen time your kids are getting, take a real, honest look at their habits.

  • Keep a simple log:

    • When are screens being used the most?

    • What are they watching/playing?

    • What’s happening before and after screen time?

  • The goal isn’t to criticize yourself—it’s to spot patterns that can help you make realistic adjustments.

• Ask why screens are being used.

  • Screen time often fills a need—but what need is it filling?

    • Are they using screens because they’re bored and don’t have engaging alternatives?

    • Is it out of habit, because screens have become the default?

    • Is it for convenience, because it’s the easiest option in busy moments?

  • Once you understand the why, you can start making small, targeted changes that actually address the root cause.

• Experiment with small adjustments.

  • Once you’ve identified the main why, swap one screen-heavy habit for something different:

    • If screens are used during dinner, try replacing them with a conversation game (e.g., “Would You Rather” questions, storytelling challenges).

    • If screens are a default morning routine, see if an alternative wake-up activity (like a short book, puzzle, or breakfast conversation) makes a difference.

    • If screens are filling downtime, introduce an easy, go-to screen-free option (like a Boredom Box, outdoor play, or simple chores with a fun twist).

• Ditch the all-or-nothing mindset.

  • If your child had more screen time than you’d like today, that’s okay. Instead of thinking, “I failed again”, try:

    • “What worked well today?”

    • “What’s one small tweak I can make tomorrow?”

  • Progress matters more than perfection. Any reduction in unnecessary screen time is a step in the right direction.

When you replace guilt with curiosity, screen-time struggles become easier to navigate. Instead of feeling like you’re constantly messing up, you start learning, adapting, and making real improvements—without the unnecessary stress.

Mindset Shift #5: From "I’m Alone" to "We’re in it Together"

It’s easy to feel like you’re the only parent dealing with screen-time battles. You see other families on social media posting about their kids doing hands-on activities, happily reading books, or playing outside with no mention of screens in sight. Meanwhile, your child is throwing a fit because you turned off their favorite show after an hour. It can feel like you’re failing while everyone else has it figured out.

Why It’s Unproductive:

• Feeling isolated makes it harder to stay motivated. If you think you’re the only one struggling, it’s easy to feel discouraged and give up.

• It creates unnecessary pressure. Instead of focusing on what’s realistic for your family, you may end up comparing yourself to others, which just leads to more frustration.

• It makes screen time feel like an individual burden rather than a shared effort. When you take on the responsibility alone, it can feel overwhelming—like it’s all on you to fix the problem.

The truth? You are not alone. Screen time is a challenge for most parents, and every family is figuring it out in their own way. Instead of thinking of this as a solo struggle, start seeing it as something you can navigate with support, shared strategies, and a team effort within your own home.

Implementation Strategies:

• Connect with other parents who are working through the same challenges.

  • There are plenty of parenting groups, online forums, and local dad meetups where parents openly share their screen-time struggles and solutions.

  • Try searching for screen-time parenting groups on Facebook or Reddit—you’ll quickly see that plenty of other dads are dealing with the same things you are.

  • Even just hearing what other parents struggle with can also help shift your mindset from frustration to problem-solving.

• Talk to other dads about their experiences.

  • Chances are, some of your friends, co-workers, or family members are going through the same thing—but no one talks about it.

  • Bring it up in conversation: “How do you handle screen time with your kids?” You might be surprised how many other dads are looking for answers too.

  • Sharing strategies, wins, and struggles makes screen time feel less like a battle and more like a common parenting challenge you can tackle together.

• Make screen-free time a family effort.

  • Instead of making screen limits your rule for them, involve everyone in the process.

  • Let your kids be part of setting screen rules. Ask: “What’s one activity you’d love to do instead of watching TV?” Giving them a say increases their buy-in.

  • Instead of saying, “No more screens after dinner,” try replacing that time with a family activity like playing a board game, telling stories, or going for a walk.

  • When screen-free time becomes something the whole family participates in rather than something you have to enforce, it feels less like a struggle and more like a shared experience.

Shifting from “I’m in this alone” to “I have support, and we’re figuring this out together” makes all the difference. You’re not the only one trying to build better screen habits, and you don’t have to do it alone. There’s strength in connection, and the more you lean into that, the easier this process becomes.

Small Changes, Big Impact

If there’s one thing to take away from all of this, it’s that screen time isn’t just about rules—it’s about how we approach it.

A lot of times, we get caught up in thinking we have to be perfect. We have to set hard limits, get rid of screens overnight, or feel guilty every time we let our kids watch something. But the truth is, small changes add up—and that’s what really makes a difference.

Mindset First, Everything Else Follows

When you shift the way you think about screen time, everything else gets easier. Let’s do a quick recap:

• From Limitation to Opportunity → Screen-free time isn’t about taking something away—it’s about creating new opportunities for play, creativity, and connection.

• From All or Nothing to Small Wins → Progress matters more than perfection. Even a little less screen time is a win.

• From "I’m Too Busy" to "Let’s Be Creative," → You don’t have to entertain your kids 24/7. A few simple tweaks can make screen-free moments part of your daily routine.

• From Guilt to Curiosity → Instead of beating yourself up, take a step back and figure out what’s actually working (or not) in your home.

• From "I’m Alone" to "We’re in it Together," → You’re not the only one navigating this. There are a lot of parents working toward the same goal—and support makes all the difference.

At the end of the day, this isn’t about getting rid of screens completely. It’s about being intentional and making sure screens aren’t the only option.

So here’s the challenge: try one of these mindset shifts this week. Just one. See how it changes things. Pay attention to how your kids react. Notice what works. And remember, you don’t have to have it all figured out right away. Every step in the right direction counts.

Final Thoughts

At the end of the day, this isn’t about taking something away—it’s about what you’re adding. More time to connect. More space for creativity. More chances to just be present with your kids.

You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to start.

So, what’s one small change you can make this week? Let’s make screen-free moments count.

The 7-Day Screen-Free Dad Challenge (Coming Soon!)

I know that shifting screen time habits can feel overwhelming, and sometimes you just need a plan to follow. That’s why I’m putting together a 7-Day Screen-Free Dad Challenge—a simple, step-by-step way to cut back on screens without the stress, guilt, or fights.

Each day will focus on one small, realistic change—things like tracking your current screen use, swapping one screen habit for something better, and setting up easy screen-free routines. No drastic changes, no impossible rules—just a practical approach that actually works.

The challenge is launching soon, so keep an eye out for all the details!

If you want to be the first to know when it drops, sign up for the Screen-Free Dad Newsletter—you’ll get updates, tips, and everything you need to get started.

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We’ve all been there. Sitting in the pediatrician’s office bored out of your mind. You don’t dare look at your phone because you don’t want to look bad when the doctor randomly comes through the door, so you scan the room looking for something—anything—remotely interesting to read.

You skim through a flyer about flu symptoms. Then a brochure about feeding your kids broccoli instead of cookies. You read the label on some lotion on the counter. It’s anti-bacterial, which makes sense, given you’re sitting in a doctor’s office.

And then you see it. The screen time recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).

You already know what it says and how it’s going to make you feel, but for some reason, you read it anyway:

• Under 18 months: Avoid screen time other than video chatting.

• Age 18–24 months: Find high-quality programming (if you choose to introduce screen time), and watch or play together.

• Age 2–5: Limit screen use to one hour per day of high-quality programs.

Cue the dad guilt.

Because let’s be real—those limits sound impossible. Screens are everywhere. Life is chaotic. Sometimes, you just need to plop your kid in front of Ms. Rachel so you can fold the laundry in peace. And before you know it, that “quick” screen time break turns into hours, and you’re left wondering if you’re ruining your kid’s brain development.

Like you, I’ve read all the articles about why screen time is bad for little kids. I’ve seen the warnings about attention spans, sleep disruption, and social development. But even knowing all of that, it was still hard to actually follow through with limiting screen time.

Because honestly? It didn’t feel that bad.

I mean, these days, there are some great educational shows out there. Ms. Rachel teaches phonics, Bluey encourages imaginative play, and there are even shows that introduce STEM concepts to toddlers. It’s easy to think,

Well, if they’re learning something, it can’t be that bad, right?

But the more I thought about it, the more I started to see different perspectives. What finally clicked for me, and what actually changed my perspective, was realizing that it wasn’t just about what they were watching. It was about what they were missing out on.

I had been so focused on whether or not the content was “educational” that I wasn’t thinking about everything they could have been doing if they weren’t in front of a screen.

That’s what I want to dig into today. Not just why too much screen time isn’t great, but what kids lose when screens take over. Once I understood that limiting screen time didn’t feel like a struggle—it felt like an opportunity.

How Screens Are Stealing Childhood’s Most Valuable Experiences

Think back to when you were a kid. What did you do when you were bored?

If you were like me, you went outside with your friends/siblings to build a fort or make up a ridiculous game to play. Or maybe you just sat on your bed staring at the ceiling, searching for silly faces in the texture.

That boredom, as frustrating as it sometimes felt, was actually doing something important. It was teaching us how to entertain ourselves, solve problems, and think creatively.

Kids today don’t get as many of those experiences. Because when they’re bored, and you’re busy, it’s way too easy to hand them a tablet or turn on a show.

But when screens become the norm, kids lose out on:

• Outdoor play (which helps with coordination, risk-taking, and imagination)

• Unstructured boredom (which is actually great for brain development)

• Deep human connection (because nothing replaces real face-to-face interaction)

• Creative play (which builds storytelling skills, problem-solving, and independence)

We recently moved to a new city and have been very fortunate that our new neighborhood has a BUNCH of kids. And with three parks within walking distance of our house, there are always kids running around, riding bikes, playing tag, and just being kids.

It has been an amazing experience watching our kids interact with their new neighbors and friends.

Their sense of exploration and creativity has taken off in a way we’ve never seen before. Every time we go to the park, they play with other kids and come up with new games, build forts, create obstacle courses, and invent entire worlds where everyone has a role to play.

Instead of just following a script from a TV show, they are making up their own stories, their own challenges, and their own adventures together.

Watching them dive into play like this has made me realize that the real value isn’t just in limiting screen time—it’s in making sure they have the freedom and space to explore, imagine, and grow in ways a screen could never replace.

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Practical Ways to Cut Back (Without Losing Your Mind)

The problem isn’t that kids watch too much. It’s that they do too little. When screens become the default, they lose opportunities to play, create, explore, and learn in ways that actually stick. And the best way to help? It isn’t just pulling them away from screens. It’s giving them something else to do instead.

Now I know what you’re thinking. So, how do I make that happen without losing my mind?

And let me tell you, you do it a little bit at a time.

Small shifts can make big differences.

Here are some ideas:

1. Replace Screen Time with Hands-On Activities

When kids have opportunities to play, build, and explore, screens become less of a default choice.

Build something:

If I’ve learned anything in the 4 years of being a dad, it’s that kids are pretty good at building things.

Instead of letting your kids watch another episode of a show, pull out legos, blogs, or even cardboard boxes and let them create something from scratch.

Ask them to build a spaceship, a castle, or even a store where they sell imaginary products. If they need inspiration, challenge them: Can you build the tallest tower in the whole world? Or What kind of a house would a superhero live in?

Turn waiting time into a waiting game:

Whether you’re in line at the grocery store, sitting in a waiting room, or waiting for food at a restaurant, resist the urge to hand over your phone. Instead, make a game out of it. Play I Spy, take turns making up a story, or do a quick round of “Would You Rather?”

The goal is to help kids find fun in the little, boring moments instead of always relying on a screen for entertainment.

Set a Daily 10-Minute Outdoor Challenge:

This one’s simple: get outside every single day, even if it’s just for 10 minutes.

Go for a quick walk, kick a soccer ball around, or let your kids climb trees. If they resist, turn it into a game. See who can find the weirdest-shaped rock, or have them pretend they’re explorers on a mission.

What starts as a 10-minute habit often turns into longer stretches of outdoor play.

Recently, I discovered the 1,000-hour outside challenge. This movement encourages parents to spend time outside with their children. The goal is to spend 1,000 hours outside for the year. Now, I know what you’re thinking: That’s an incredibly lofty goal. It’s true that 1,000 hours translates to a little less than 3 hours per day, which, like the AAP screentime guidelines, feels impossible. But honestly, I think that’s kind of the point.

The overarching goal of this challenge is to encourage you and your kids to get outside as much as possible. The cool thing is that even if you “fail” and only get outside 500 hours a year, that still averages out to about 1.5 hours outside every day. That alone is a huge accomplishment.

My advice, start off small and then ramp up as you go. Spending 10 minutes outside is WAY better than spending zero minutes outside.

2. Help Kids Get Comfortable with Boredom

Kids today aren’t used to boredom.

And that’s a problem.

Think back to when you were a kid. How often were you bored? I’d venture to guess it was often. At least once per day.

But kids today live in a world where entertainment is always available, and that means kids don’t often get the chance to sit in boredom long enough to figure out how to entertain themselves.

And that’s a good thing!

Boredom isn’t something to fix. It’s something to let them figure out.

Next time your kid says, “I’m bored,” resist the urge to solve the problem for them. Instead, ask them:

“What else could you do right now?”

If they say, “I don’t know,” don’t rush in with a list of ideas. Give them space to think. It might take a while at first (and they will probably complain), but eventually, they’ll start coming up with their own ideas.

And the more they practice, the easier it gets.

Here are some other ways to help kids build creativity through boredom:

• Create a boredom box: Fill a box with art supplies, old magazines, tape, scissors, and random household objects. When they say they're bored, point them to the box and let them create something.

• Start a Daily “No Screens” block: Set a specific time each day when screens aren’t an option. At first, they might not know what to do and will likely need some guidance. But over time, they’ll start finding ways to fill that time on their own.

• Let Them Be in Charge: Give your kid an open-ended task like, “Make up a game with only these three objects” or “Create a new rule for tag.” When they’re in control, they’re more likely to get invested.

Believe it or not, kids crave boredom. Or at least their biology does. For their development, kids need to experience boredom and learn how to overcome it. When you give them the opportunity to do so, you’ll see them grow, and their creativity will skyrocket.

My older daughter used to have a ROUGH time in the car on long road trips. And since most of our family live in different states than us, we often have to go on long road trips for holidays and vacations, so we end up going on lots of long road trips.

Driving long distances with a screaming child in the back seat is a stressful experience, and for a long time, my wife and I would default to screens to calm our daughter. But we quickly learned that the more we did that, the worse it got.

It wasn’t until we helped our daughter learn to experience boredom that we started to see improvements. We would give her suggestions to sing songs, read books, or create a game. At first, she was very hesitant and complained a lot. But over time, she really learned how to interact with and embrace her boredom.

Fast-forward to last summer when we had three back-to-back family reunions in three different states. She had very few issues with the over 70 hours of driving we did over the three weeks.

Our kids are sometimes more resilient than we realize. Don’t believe me? Test it out for yourself. The next time they are bored, help them use creativity to overcome that boredom and you’ll be amazed at how capable they are.

3. Model the Behavior You Want to See

This one’s tough but SOOO important.

Whether we like it or not, our kids are constantly watching us. If we’re constantly glued to our phones, they notice. Like us, they learn from what we do, not just what we say.

Think about it: If we take them to the park to play but then just sit on the bench scrolling through our phones, what message are we really sending them?

We need to show them that reliance on screens isn’t ideal. To do that, we need to reduce our reliance on screens.

Here are some suggestions on how we can make screen-free time a family effort:

• Create tech-free zones: Pick a few places/times in the house where screens are not allowed. Some suggestions could be the dinner table, bedrooms, or during meal times.

• Do screen-free activities together: Remember, the goal isn’t to find better ways to distract our kids so we can spend more time disengaged. We are all working to make the most of the time we have with our kids. Instead of telling our kids to put away screens or stop watching TV, do something with them. Go outside, cook a meal together, or create something with them.

• Be aware of our own screen habits: Whether on Android or iPhone, we all get that dreaded notification each Sunday telling us how many hours we spend on our phones each day. Next time you get that notification, don’t just swipe it away. Study it, take note of the time you spend on your phone, and make active plans to limit it. Even little changes, like leaving your phone inside while you play outside, can help shift the focus back to the real-world experiences we are striving for.

Our younger daughter is only 1 ½ years old, but very early on, I noticed her wanting to play with my phone so badly. At first, I thought it was just innocent mimicking of what she’d seen me and my wife do. But then I noticed that she would get very upset if I didn’t let her play with it or if I took it away from her. That’s when I realized it probably wasn’t as innocent as I originally thought.

Yes, she was mimicking what her parents were doing, and that is a very age-appropriate thing to do. But was that really what I wanted her to mimic? I realized that my wife and I were on our phones so often that our 1 ½-year-old daughter picked up on that.

It was an eye-opening experience for me and helped me realize that my reliance on screens was influencing my kids in a negative way.

We need to work hard to avoid modeling the behaviors we are trying to teach our kids not to do. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it. Plus, modeling behavior is a two-way street. As our kids see us enjoying screen-free time, they’ll be more likely to do the same.

A Guilt-Free Approach to Raising Kids in a Digital World

The goal here isn’t perfection. It’s progress.

Some days, your kids will play outside for hours and completely forget all about screens. But other days, you’ll be exhausted, plop them in front of the TV, and let them watch way more than you planned. And that’s okay.

The key is to make sure screens aren’t taking over. We don’t want screens to replace the real-world experiences that actually help our kids grow.

So instead of stressing about how much time they’re spending on screens, start asking:

What real-life experiences do I want my kids to have today?

That’s the question that changed everything for me. And once I started thinking that way, limiting screen time stopped feeling like a battle and started feeling like an opportunity both for me and my kids.

It was 2 a.m. on March 7th, 2021. My wife shook me awake with the words I’d been preparing for:

It’s time.

Groggy, I opened the contraction timer app I had downloaded to my phone and began timing the contractions.

Thirty minutes later, the result was clear. We needed to get to the hospital.

We lived only five minutes away, but that short drive felt like an eternity. My mind raced as I mentally sorted through all the books, articles, videos, and classes I’d consumed over the past 9 months.

I had prepared for this moment, but suddenly, I wasn’t sure I was ready.

We arrived at the hospital, and the rest was a blur. They rushed us into a hospital room. My wife immediately started pushing. There was screaming. There was yelling. And then, just a few hours later, our first daughter was born.

And just like that, I was a father.

Holding her in my arms, I instantly felt the gravity of the moment. It was overwhelming but also… reassuring. In the chaos of the moment, I felt so strongly that everything was exactly as it should be.

This was my purpose.

I was meant to be a dad.

It was at that exact moment my life changed. Suddenly, the decisions I made and the actions I took weren’t just about me anymore. They shaped her world and her future.

That realization, while overwhelming, was also defining.

From that day forward, every choice I made had one purpose: to give her and any future siblings the best life I could.

Fast-forward three years.

I’m in the basement of my house, watching my two daughters (ages 1 and 3) play while I stare at my laptop, wondering:

Was this really the right decision?

I just quit my job. No backup plan. Not much savings. Just a gut feeling that something had to change.

For the last year and a half, I have been working at a failing software startup. I took the job because it was remote, and I wanted to be home with my kids. But as the months passed, the stress piled up, my workload doubled, and my patience wore thin.

And the worst part? Even though I was home, I wasn’t really present.

I wanted to be, but work always came first. And when I needed a quick fix to keep the kids occupied, I reached for the easiest solution—screens.

At first, I told myself it was temporary, but I kept finding excuses to justify plopping them in front of a screen.

“I’ll take them to the park on my lunch break.” Didn’t happen…

“I grew up watching TV. I turned out fine… right?” Debatable…

“Ms. Rachel has TWO Master’s degrees. She’s offering them WAY more than I have time for right now.” True. I can’t compete with Ms. Rachel…

I kept reassuring myself that this was okay. It wasn’t going to be like this forever. But the truth is, this became our daily routine.

Then one day, I looked up and thought:

Is this really the kind of dad I want to be?

I sat with that question longer than I’d like to admit. I kept telling myself I’d do better tomorrow, but tomorrow never came. I knew something had to change—not just for my kids, but for me too.

And I know I’m not the only dad who’s been here.

We all love our kids and want to be present, but life gets in the way. Work becomes overwhelming, and before we know it, screens become the easy fallback.

But I don’t believe it has to be that way.

That’s why I started The Screen-Free Dad. I wanted a place for dads like me (and maybe you, too) who want to be more engaged, more creative, and more there for our kids without screens getting in the way.

This newsletter isn’t about guilt or unrealistic expectations. It’s about finding practical ways to reduce screen time—not just for our kids, but for ourselves too. It’s about discovering simple, fun, and meaningful ways to connect as dads.

I’m figuring it out as I go, and I hope you’ll join me.

I don’t have all the answers.

No dad does.

But I do know this:

So let’s be present for them. Let’s trade screen time for story time, distractions for connection, and background noise for belly laughs.

Let’s make fatherhood an adventure worth remembering.

If this resonates with you, I hope you’ll stick around. I’d love to hear your stories, your ideas, your wins, your struggles, and everything in between.

Fatherhood isn’t about being perfect—it’s about showing up, being present, and making the moments we have count.

Because, at the end of the day, our kids don’t need perfect dads.

They just need us.